Red Silences
by Iloveplotbunnies
Summary: Four months would change everything between them. J/L-ish. Jello-Forever Secret Summer Santa Gift for Just Mosie.
1. Faithfully

**Red Silences**

**Summary:** Four months would change everything between them. J/L-ish. Secret Summer Santa Gift for Just Mosie.

**Disclaimer:** I own four characters, the plot and the twisted mindset…everything else sadly belongs to someone other than me.

**Spoilers: **Set after 2x23 or "Red Sky in the Morning"

**Prompt: **Jane finds reminders of his family.

**A/N: **

First off, I would just like to say before we jump into the proverbial rabbit hole-this story has already been completely written, and it may or may not have a sequel depending on my updating schedule in the next few weeks.

I DO plan to update _Sweet Surrender _and _Taking Chances _this week, as soon as everything else that I pushed aside in favor of the Summer Secret Santa is completely finished.

Anyway, onto the story, penned for Just Mosie with her prompt, Jane finds reminders of his family.

Enjoy.

* * *

**Chapter One:**

**Faithfully**

The poem was a diversion, the beautiful assistant to the magician of sorts—Jane knew that, because if it weren't a diversion; Red John wouldn't have allowed their meeting to be captured on tape nor would he have worn such a cheap rubber dime store mask to make his first appearance to Jane.

Personally, he did not feel anything wrong about lying to Lisbon, as what Red John said would _never _amount to anything more than knowing that Red John loved literature and thought he was helping Jane out by keeping him on his toes. None of that would help them capture the bastard but as he rested his head against his soft pillow, his body on the air mattress and the poem dancing and echoing in the silence, with the book between his hands and chest did he remember that something was in his vest pocket. Jane retracted his fingers from atop the leather bound book to pull aside his black jacket, and shove his hand into the vest pocket to pull out the red-stained silver chain, gently.

Patrick Jane also knew that if Lisbon found out that he had lifted material from a crime scene, she would be pissed and then she would make some claim about him hindering the investigation but how did one go around hindering any investigation if the chain was for you and you alone.

Jane's blue-green eyes reflected off the chain, as he twirled it around his finger until a sob broke from his lips. Eyes pained and shadowed by the knowledge that the _inexpensive _silver necklace, wrapped around his finger, had been bought for his daughter at Disneyland on her third birthday. However, sob was because of the very idea that the bastard had unhooked the chain from around his daughter's neck, her neck careening with life as she lay on the floor, waiting for her daddy to come home with her wide, lifeless eyes staring up at the ceiling, his wife next to her in the same state.

Overall, it was the seven years of guilt that had resonated deep within that would kill him, the guilt that Jane had spent so long trying to bury deeper and deeper within him at every shy breath, and the sudden chill of the night consumed him again, swallowing him whole into the ever-verging darkness.

He lifted the cover of the book on his chest and pulled out a slender knife hidden within the pages.

It was going to be a long night.

**OoO**

Lisbon did not spare a glance or a greeting at him, as he stepped into the bullpen mid-afternoon, the chain encircled around his neck while he made his almost ritualistic movement to smile at Van Pelt, who weakly smiled back before she glanced down at her computer screen. He moved a few steps over to tease Rigsby; however, his heart was not in it, which left him with some overused joke about Rigsby's eating habits while the man in question stared back at him in mute surprise, as Cho focused his own eyes on Jane. They all knew the man had been different lately, especially since the events of three days ago but as the man sunk down onto the couch, and crossed his arms against his chest and closed his eyes, the three shared concerned glances.

It was not until he began to scream, no more than thirty minutes later, jagged nails digging into his own pale-fleshed neck, did Van Pelt, Rigsby and Cho realize that Patrick Jane was beyond fixable.

**OoO**

Lisbon tried to ignore him when he stepped into the bullpen mid-afternoon, but she soon found that impossible as she watched him from her open blinds, a slightly off-kilter smile on his face as he greeted each member of the unit except her.

She was not about to greet him, or even let him catch her eye because she knew he lied. CSU had finally turned over the evidence, and Lisbon had finally been able to watch the tape down in the cold evidence locker of the CBI; and to think that all these deaths had occurred because two individuals wanted to make homage to one of the _greatest _serial killers of all time, Red John.

Even as Lisbon had rushed in, her gun bared to save Jane—she was not expecting the blood bath sprayed against the gothic walls, or splashed across the floor in tidal pools of scarlet. Lisbon felt her heart accelerate, blood pounding through her ears as the question vibrated against the inside of her skull _what if _Jane was the victim or what if Jane was missing. It was not until she could hear the telltale signs of dry sobbing, and dry retching did she realize that he was _safe_. Her stomach dropped, and though, Teresa Lisbon was a strong woman all on her own, she lost her stomach contents on the patterned floor below her feet, she lifted the back of her hand weakly to her mouth and wiped away at the fowl liquid.

"Lisbon?" Jane's voice had called out to her, and she did not care. She didn't care that she was tracking vomit with her as she ran to him or that Red John could still be lurking around, all she cared about was that her consultant was safe and sound, all she cared about was that the man before her, blonde hair and all still had life in him, was still himself.

It was clear though, he was not himself. Jane lied to Lisbon yes, it was to be expected from the wayward consultant but _never _had Jane hid something from her pertaining to Red John and it hurt. She thought she could trust him but the more she thought about it, _trust _wasn't a word she could or would ever associate with Patrick Jane as he did whatever he had to do to protect himself, and more recently, her. She knew though, that when it came down to it, Patrick Jane always had her back and she always had his…friends did that for each other, right?

Teresa Lisbon however, could not ignore the tightening in her chest as her mind retraced the last few days, the lost look across his features during the tape, the unadulterated fear shining in his eyes as Red John leaned closer and closer to him. Every moment a little bit more antagonizing because what if the breath you had just taken, was the last breath you would ever take? She could not imagine not coming into the office in the morning, and not seeing him on that couch of his but as she thought about it, she knew she was losing him slowly but surely.

Patrick Jane was slipping away from her, and for the first time in her life, Teresa Lisbon did not know what to do about it, her mind whirled with many possible solutions: therapy, hugs, gifts, and talks. None of those ideas were _wonderful_ solutions because in all the years she had known the man that was Patrick Jane, Jane was never a touchy sort of person, he was the one who bought them gifts, and he loathed any and all sort of therapy plus everything she said to him, in terms of a personal or professional life went in one ear and out the other. However, when Lisbon heard the scream from the bullpen, and though she was pissed as hell at him for lying—she ran out from her office to find the man who occupied her thoughts, thrashing against the worn leather couch—nails digging into his throat, scarlet staining the pale color of his hands.

Lisbon did the only thing she could think to do to keep him calm; she threw her legs over top of him and straddled his middle section, her stressed face focused down on his.

"Jane…" Lisbon coaxed softly, and his body stopped thrashing around as the screams turned into soft whimpers and eerie words, which filled the silence.

_"…worthless…" _

"Jane?" Lisbon repeated, he didn't stir but he continued to whimper and Lisbon glanced up at her team, who stared at her in complete surprise, even Cho, who normally wore an unexpressive mask had somewhat of a concerned glint in his eyes.

"Is he okay?" Van Pelt asked with her voice barely above a whisper as Rigsby rushed from the room, Van Pelt followed without receiving her answer and Cho barely glanced at Lisbon before he followed them, leaving the bullpen completely empty, except for Jane and Lisbon as most employees were at a department budget meeting.

"Jane?" Lisbon repeated again, and she gained no response from the man but as she glanced down at his bloody neck, she noticed a single piece of jewelry attached to his neck, and she leaned over to unclasp the necklace from around his neck.

Instead of the whimpers dying, he began to scream again and his hand flew up and smacked Lisbon across the face in order to keep her away from his neck, she stared in disbelief and he began to sob again.

_"…I couldn't save you…." _

Instead of straddling him, she twisted her other leg dangling off Jane to come meet her other leg against the back of the couch and pressed her throbbing cheek against the cool material of Jane's vest, his soft sobs continued as she clenched onto him with the soft words and promises that everything would be alright humming in the air around the both of them—but she knew it was all a lie, as she couldn't do anything to save him from himself when she had her own problems to fix.

**OoO**

It was dark when Jane awoke, his sleep having turned from nightmares to complete blissfulness—he didn't even remember stepping into work, nor did he remember someone ever having been on top of him either; he carefully guided his hand from over the couch's edge to slowly bring them up to where his chest was supposed to be, he ghosted his fingers over whatever it was, only to come into contact with long soft hair.

Jane stiffened, and the person on top of him burrowed into him—soft snores coming from her direction as words flittered past her lips.

"Patrick…" Jane relaxed, it was Lisbon…it was not Van Pelt (not that he would have minded having Van Pelt on his chest but Rigsby might not have liked that.) It was then, after a few moments of silent reflection on why Van Pelt was the ideal choice to have on his chest that the full realization hit him, Lisbon was on top of him—her cheek pressed against his chest and it was the feeling of her chest rising and falling against his abdomen.

He opened his mouth to wake her, but he found he could not and his hand began to run through her dark hair in a soothing matter. Patrick Jane however, could not ignore the strange heartwarming feeling rushing through his veins and that made him feel worse, much worse.

After all, he could not be in love with Lisbon.

They were only friends, right?

"I'm sorry…"

The word broke the peaceful silence around them, and the dam Jane held tightly, broke as he sobbed silently, still running his fingers through her soft hair as she slept peacefully through, unaware that things between the two of them were about to change.


	2. Broken

**Red Silences**

**Chapter Warnings:** Self Harm.

Thank you to **Jisbon4ever **and **krolinette **for their lovely reviews and encouragement, as well to all the alerters for this story. I plan to update this story everyday, unless something prevents me from doing so.

Enjoy!

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**Chapter 2:**

**Broken**

"Hey, can we talk?" Jane glanced at Lisbon from his position on the worn leather couch, his blue-green eyes focused on the dark haired woman who held her arms crossed against her own chest.

"It depends."

"On...?" Jane did not respond, which left Lisbon somewhat annoyed as he just smirked instead. "Jane?"

"Oh, you're still here?" Lisbon gritted her teeth, but otherwise kept somewhat of a small calming smile on her face.

"Jane, my office..." When he did not move, she leaned down and tweaked him on the nose as she had done with the Prescott case. "Now!" Jane grumbled but began to move from the couch to follow Lisbon.

"Dead man walking..." Rigsby uttered, and Lisbon rolled her eyes in mild annoyance-Jane wasn't in trouble, but they needed to talk.

"If you don't stop it, I'll have you on stake duty until you retire." Lisbon snapped, which caused Rigsby to glue his eyes back on the computer screen. The two continued forward into her office, and she opened the door for him to which he stepped forward to sit on her couch and she closed the door behind her, she then crossed the distance to her desk and leaned against the outside of her desk before she peered at Jane. "J..."

"I didn't do anything." He stated, as his eyes gazed upon hers. "I..."

"Exactly." Lisbon interrupted with a frown. "You haven't done _anything_."

"I thought you'd like that..." Jane began and Lisbon shook her head.

"I do." She said. "I think it's thoughtful that you'd think of me before you pulled any of your half-assed stuff, but I'm worried that things may not be alright." Jane cocked his head to the side, a huge smirk plastered across his face.

"Aw, Lisbon...I never thought I'd see the day that you were concerned about me." Jane cockily responded, he leaned back on the couch and opened his mouth again to say something when Lisbon interrupted.

"You think nobody notices the things you do," Lisbon quietly told him, her eyes focused intensely on him. "It's not hard to see that you've been shutting us all out…"

"I haven't…"

"Don't lie to me," she told him quietly. "I thought you had more respect for me that that."

"I do." Jane defended his self, as he grinned brightly up at the senior agent. "I don't know why you think I'm closing you out; I'm still talking to you and…"

"You haven't gotten us a lawsuit in days."

"Meh," Jane told her. "I just don't feel like being punched in the face…"

"Jane, you've been like this since…"

"Don't." Jane interrupted her, coldly. "I don't want to talk about this, Lisbon."

"Yes, well everyone at some point has to talk about things that they don't want to discuss." She explained, and Jane raised his eyebrow in response.

"Oh, you would know wouldn't you?" Jane asked. "Considering you've been _very _forthcoming with talking about Bosco, or Hightower…" Lisbon grew silent. "I'm not ready to speak about what happened and…"

"You lied to me."

"What?"

"You heard me, you _lied _to me."

"No…"

"Oh really?" She asked. "You want to know how I know." He didn't say anything but instead glanced at the floor beneath his feet as she stepped over to her desk and pulled out the evidence bag, which contained the video tape. "You told me he said nothing to you."

"He didn't."

"Now this is just insulting." Lisbon stated. "You know I've got the tape in front of me, you know what the bureau can do to undercover audio and yet you still insist nothing was said?" Jane hesitated before he nodded.

"Yup."

"I…I…" She managed, and he shrugged.

"What does it matter if he says something or not, we're never going to catch him…?"

"It does matter." Lisbon responded. "Justice…"

"Who cares about justice?" Jane asked. "You've recently lost two important people in your life, and you still care about _justice_?" It was obvious that he found it slightly hilarious. "Do you think Van Pelt or Rigsby would care about justice if it came between them and their romance?"

"There's a difference between office romance and catching Red John." Lisbon remarked and Jane glanced at her.

"Why? Some days I actually believe that there's no difference in either-because both result in an end of something." Jane stated. "I'm sorry Lisbon, but it's not important…" She slammed her fist down on her table, which caused him to stare at her in surprise.

"Do you want to know what I heard the other day?" Lisbon asked which caused Jane to raise his eyebrow at her again in question.

"You probably heard Rigsby…"

"I heard you." Lisbon interrupted, and he blinked. "I heard you, crying." Jane blanched.

"No, you didn't."

"Yes, I did." Lisbon stated. "Unless you weren't the man I fell asleep on top of last weekend." Jane shrugged his shoulders.

"…it must have been someone else."

"Come on, don't do this to us…" he didn't respond, and she continued. "…to me."

"Can I ask you a question?" Jane asked, and she nodded. "Have you ever done something that you know you shouldn't do, but you did it anyway?" She peered at him.

"What did you do?" He glanced around, before he shook his head.

"Nothing…" He shifted in his spot and Lisbon sighed.

"I want you to know that I'm here to help you whenever you need it." She explained. "But…if you're doing something…"

"I'm not." He rushed and she raised her eyebrow.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes." He lied, as he stood from her couch. "Thank you Lisbon, I'm perfectly fine now." Lisbon opened her mouth to respond, but he left and her words spilled out into the room.

"You're not fine," Lisbon muttered, her voice only hitting the empty office. "Please stop lying to me."

**OoO**

Jane let his smile slip as soon as he stepped into his apartment, on most nights-he'd either stay at the CBI or go to his apartment, but if he ever needed the comfort or a reminder of why he still worked with Teresa Lisbon and her unit, he'd end up back in his Malibu home without it's furniture and the red smiley smeared across the walls.

Tonight however, he just needed to be alone especially after his confrontation with Lisbon.

His hand reached for the leather book, and opened it to carefully reveal the knife nestled within its scarlet stained pages; he tilted the book over and the smooth knife fell into the palm of his hand, where he wrapped his large fingers around the dark handle and pulled back the sleeve of his white dress shirt to grant enough room to allow him to lick his own wounds with the silver of the blade.

_This is for all the lies, I shouldn't have told. _

The blade slid through his soft skin, as if the knife were slicing through melted butter-in fascination, he watched as the blood bubbled from the wound, ran down his arm and stained his fingers as he placed his bloody fingers on the carpet, an impression being left behind; Jane couldn't even remember a time after his wife and daughter's death that he hadn't done something stupid like this to himself.

Sophie had told him that he needed help, but he refused to get that help because nothing was wrong with him.

He let bitter laughter hit the darkness, and his eyes flashed in anger.

_This is for what I can't do, this is for what I can't give up._

Another slice, in a different part of his already scarred skin.

Another trail of tears, which would mix with the bloody mess to remain on his clothing, on the floor, on his hands, on the blade...

_This is for…._

Someone was at his door, and Jane panicked as he thumbed to place the knife back in its spot.

"Jane?"

It was Lisbon, shit.

**OoO**

Teresa Lisbon stood outside Patrick Jane's door, her black jacket folded in her hands as she waited patiently for the man to answer the door.

"Jane?"

Lisbon heard a soft moan and then a heavy thump behind the door, and without even thinking-she pulled her off-duty gun from her holster and held it in her hand as she kicked the door open with her foot.

"Jane?" Lisbon called again, and when he didn't respond…she rushed forward, and threw her gun on the bed as she came across the sight of her bleeding consultant, a knife jutting out of his abdomen. Lisbon didn't hesitate to pull her phone from her pocket, hold it up to her ear and call 911 as her heart pounded in her chest; how could she _not _have noticed these things, especially when they were right under her nose?

On their way to the hospital, his heart gave out twice and she held onto his hand for dear life, _don't you dare leave me yet_.

**OoO**

They say that waiting is the hardest part, especially when someone you care about is in surgery because of a stupid stunt he pulled. For Lisbon, it's no different especially as she sits in the deserted sterile hospital waiting room at 2 AM in the morning. Jane's been in surgery for more than two hours now, and the doctors aren't any surer of his progress than they were when he had first arrived.

She called the unit, and told them not to come—Jane probably wouldn't be awake straight out of surgery anyway and she doubted that he'd want them to see him like this.

"He's fine." The doctor finally told her, after two more hours of anxious waiting and three more hospital room coffees flowing through her system to keep her wide-awake and alert.

Jane was fine.

He was perfectly _fine_.

Then she could feel the relief slam her, and as she ran down the hallway to Jane-she didn't realize she was crying, her mascara running down her pallid cheeks, or the fact that she suddenly could breathe again.


	3. Another Year Has Gone By

**Red Silences**

Thank you to **Just Mosie**, **Frogster** and **Lisbon4ever** for the reviews, also thank you to the readers, and all the alerters for the story so far!

Enjoy!

* * *

**Chapter 3: **

**Another Year Has Gone By**

She wasn't expecting to be disturbed at almost three in the morning, especially as she had been curled under her covers and had some vivid dream involving herself and Rigsby, but it wasn't surprising to her. If she wasn't having weird dreams, she was becoming somewhat of an insomniac, though she blamed her insomniac on the fear that Jane might need her, as he still hadn't talked about his attempt on his life even after being released from the hospital, a week prior.

Lisbon pulled herself from her bed, and dragged herself down the hall, down the stairs and to her front door only to peek out the door window to find her consultant, who was dressed in a red sweater on her doorstep with his hands full of green, silver and red wrapped gifts. She carefully unlocked her door and opened it with her eyebrow raised.

"Jane?" Lisbon moved to lean against her door in her usual nighttime attire, and crossed her arms against her chest. "What's wrong?" Jane shook his head, and his blue-green eyes focused on her entirely.  
"Nothing's wrong, I was just in the neighborhood and I…" Jane paused. "Can I come in?" Lisbon nodded and moved backwards to allow Jane entry into her home, she shut the door behind him as he stepped into the area designated as her living room by the two couches, and the coffee table placed at the end of the large room. "Thanks." Lisbon didn't respond as he sat the collection of gifts on the table, and she racked her brain for why the consultant would be stopping by in a red sweater (it was the beginning of July after all) with gifts.

Jane's birthday was in January, and hers was in April.

It wasn't Easter, Christmas, Thanksgiving, April 15th (Yes, for some reason Jane bought her gifts on tax day), Valentine's Day, Labor Day, Memorial Day or any other holiday that Jane enjoyed celebrating. In fact, the fourth of July had just passed almost a week ago and though Jane had been in the hospital-he had still managed to send her something red, white and blue for the holiday.

"I wanted to say thank you." He told her, as he sat down on her couch. "If it weren't for you, I wouldn't be here right now." Lisbon didn't respond for a few minutes, as she sank down on the couch across from Jane. "So, in order to thank you…" Jane leaned forward and grabbed a small silver box off the top of the pile. "Merry Christmas." Of all the things Lisbon expected him to say or do, she never expected her consultant to be welcoming Christmas in July. "Oh come on; please tell me you've heard of Christmas in July."  
"I've heard of it, but I never thought you'd…" She shook her head, as he handed the box to her. "You know I can't accept those, Jane." He glanced at her.  
"I don't see why not?"  
"You're my employee, and it's my job to keep you safe." Lisbon stated as this phrase had been over rehearsed in her head almost a million different times in the fear that Jane might try to do something like this.  
"So?" He asked. "It's not like there are rules governing these things…"  
"Yes, there are."  
"No, there aren't." He told her. "I thought you couldn't accept bribes…but what about Christmas gifts?"  
"Jane, I can't accept bribes and it's not Christmas…"  
"Yes it is." He argued, and Lisbon sighed.  
"If you want to give me something…" She began, before she stared down at the floor. "Tell me why you did it." Jane paused before he smiled brightly at her.  
"Because, I wanted to thank…"  
"Not that." She interrupted, as he brought the silver wrapped package to sit back down in his lap. "I…"  
"I know what you mean." He explained. "Lisbon, I…look, I don't know what happened back there, and I'm sorry…"  
"No, you aren't." She told him, and it reminded her of their conversation a few weeks ago. "If you were sorry, you wouldn't have done this to yourself." Jane lifted his shirt to reveal the stitched and bruised skin that had marred by the knife; he traced it with his fingers and then glanced at her.

Before she knew what was happening, he held her hand and guided her hand to his abdomen wound-her fingers ghosted the flesh wound and he smiled softly in response.

"Lisbon, this isn't your fault." Jane stated.  
"Yes it is." She breathed. "I knew what was happening Jane, I knew…"  
"Did you know I was going to do this?" Jane inquired, and Lisbon shook her head. "See…"  
"But…"  
"Lisbon?" Jane questioned. "How were you supposed to know that I'd do this?" Lisbon didn't respond. "All that matters is, I'm alive and you saved my life…" She shifted her eyes toward his.  
"I…I'm sorry." She stammered and he smiled.  
"Whatever for?" Lisbon didn't respond, but she stared at his face-she regretted not sitting with him in the hospital room for every waking moment, and she was sorry for not having the courage to tell him why it about destroyed her when he tried to kill himself-instead, she only smiled softly and leaned over to take the gift from his lap. "I'm sorry for not being able to take your gift, but I'll take it now." He only laughed, let his sweater down and bent over to meet her halfway.

His lips met her forehead, and she felt the words: "thank you" being pressed into her temple.

Jane knew she was lying, but sometimes-you just couldn't rush the truth and besides that, he couldn't wait to see her expression when she opened her gift; he couldn't wait to see her beautiful, and expressive green eyes wide in surprise when her fingers opened the black velvet jewelry box.

Expansive pride swelled within him as he watched her swallow her own pride, and ignore the rules to open his gifts to keep him happy. However, he didn't expect the dark haired woman to glance at him in surprise, tears in her eyes as she glanced down at the silver chain and then at the silver chain around his own neck, he knew what she was looking at as he gingerly grasped it with his hand.

"My…my wife and I bought this for our daughter in Disneyland." He whispered. "If it were possible, she would have lived there all the time." Jane laughed, his eyes dampening. "My daughter loved "It's a Small World" ride…" Lisbon nodded with her fingers still on her own chain. "I haven't been back since."  
"Is it hard?" She asked him, and Jane shrugged.  
"I make it through the best I can." He told her, and then he bit his lip before continuing. "Lisbon, I have something else to tell you…"  
"Yes?" She scrutinized him with her gaze, as if she feared he was going to do something right in front of her.  
"This chain around my neck, it was my daughter's..." Lisbon nodded.  
"I got that."  
"…after you rescued me, I found this in my jacket pocket." Lisbon nodded again. "I told you the conversation between Red John and I wasn't important, because…it was the magician's assistant…he didn't want you to see this." Jane let his chain go, and Lisbon stared at Jane.  
"You stole evidence?"  
"No…"  
"You _withheld_ evidence...from a crime scene?"  
"Oh, Lisbon…withheld is such a strong word…"  
"Jane, you either withheld evidence or you stole it!" Jane paused, as did Lisbon.  
"It used to be my daughter's, Lisbon." Jane repeated. "If I gave to you, you would have just taken it to forensics and I would never have gotten it back." Jane looked down at the ground. "I'm sorry." Lisbon held out her hand, and he shook his head. "You can't have it."  
"I'm not asking for it." Lisbon stated, as she grabbed Jane's hand from his lap and squeezed lightly. "If anyone understands why, it's me." In the next minute, Jane did something neither of them would have expected.

He leaned forward again, and wrapped his arms around her in a hug.

"Thank you," he whispered with his throat raw with emotion and Lisbon wrapped her own arms around him as he tried to pull away from her.  
"No, thank you." She responded softly into his ear, as she pressed her head against his shoulder. "I don't think you realize just how much I need you around." He didn't respond, but for the first time in a long while-a smile broke out across his lips as the both of them relaxed into the safety of each other, the silence between them telling a complete story of regrets, apologies and what they knew they couldn't do.


	4. Hungry Like the Wolf

**Red Silences**

Thank you to **Jisbon4ever **and **Zombienath** for the reviews, and as always—the readers, and the alerters of this story. I still claim to own nothing besides four characters.

Enjoy the fourth chapter ^_^

* * *

**Chapter 4: **

**Hungry like the Wolf**

Jane was a man of simple tastes, some days.

He wanted to get over his wife's death, and start dating again-which is why he had attempted an impromptu date with Kristina Fyre, but he realized as he stepped into the bullpen the day after his and Lisbon's impromptu Christmas in July celebration that he wasn't ready for any sort of a relationship.

He couldn't even tell the one woman, who had saved his life on so many different occasions that she meant more to him than anyone else living in that world; he hadn't been lying either when he had told her that he'd call her if he were dying, but then again-he hadn't needed to call her, because she already knew he was dying. Jane quietly chuckled to his self, which gathered strange looks from Van Pelt and Rigsby.

He longed to be touched and to be loved just like everyone else-but something held him back, and it was the idea that he still loved his wife dearly, the band still on his finger as he flexed his hand back and forth to allow the light to reflect off his golden wedding band; and he wondered, what would it be like if he kissed Lisbon? Jane wondered if she had soft lips, or if her breath smelled of coffee, and to think that almost two months ago, Jane blamed his self for the fate of any female who expressed interest in him. (Personally, he had hoped that Hightower would express some interest in him next; maybe Red John could take care of the boss for them.) Jane grinned, his thoughts bordering homicidal.

"You better not be thinking of ways to kill off Hightower again." Lisbon warned under her breath to him as she walked by, and he smiled brightly in response while she tried to hide her yawn behind her hand.

"Awe, Lisbon." Jane whined. "Since when have you been able to read my mind?" She spun around to face him, and crossed her arms against her chest when something caught Jane's attention.

Lisbon's cross was gone, and in place was the simple chain he had bought her.

His heart soared in his chest, and he did his best to look unaffected while waiting for her answer.

"…I don't know why you think you're hard to read." She muttered. "You're an open book." Jane's lips twitched.

"What kind of an open book?" Jane asked, humorously. "An adventure? A fairytale…"

"Tragedy?" Cho finished for him, and Jane tossed a grin in the man's direction.

"I was thinking more along the lines of a bedtime story." Lisbon replied with a straight face, and he only grinned back at her, which had her laughing.

"Lisbon, bedtime stories have happy endings and most of them deal with princesses who find their princes."

"It's so unrealistic to little girls," Van Pelt interrupted, as she avoided Rigsby's gaze. "Who wants to listen to countless after countless tales of princesses with their extravagant beauty, long hair and ruby slippers?"

"Disney, apparently." Cho answered, and Lisbon shrugged.

"So, Lisbon?" Jane questioned. "Does this mean that you're looking for a prince to complete your fairytale?" She shrugged.

"Nope."

"Why not?"

"Oh, I'd rather die alone." The bullpen grew silent, until Jane burst out laughing in response as Van Pelt stared at him.

"That was mean."

"She's kidding." Jane stated. "Lisbon wants a handsome prince to come sweep her off her feet." Jane glanced at the dark haired agent, who looked as if she were about to punch him. "I think though Lisbon, you're a fantasy-you're hard to put down, you're magical and also very mesmerizing." Van Pelt gasped in surprise, while Cho and Rigsby raised their eyebrows toward both Jane and Lisbon, while Lisbon tried to fight her cute blush from spreading across her cheeks.

"Stop that…" She squeaked, with her cheeks tinted red.

"Don't be so modest, Lisbon." Jane pressed. "Anyone with eyes can see that you're a fantasy-on-legs."

"I agree, boss." Rigsby added, which had Lisbon throw her narrowed eyes on Rigsby who gulped and tried to look innocent, which failed miserably. "I can't say it, but Jane can't?"

"It's because I'm the consultant, and she doesn't dream about me." Rigsby's blue eyes grew wide in shock and surprise as he glanced at the now furiously blushing Lisbon. "Or maybe, she does dream about me…?"

"I don't dream about any of you!" Jane knew Lisbon was lying; he had caught her with the Rigsby deal.

"You dreamt about me, boss?"

"No." Lisbon told him, Jane nodded behind her back. "Don't be ridiculous…" Jane laughed before he opened his mouth again.

"Of course she does," Jane stated. "She probably wishes you were her prince…" Lisbon stomped off in the direction of her office as Rigsby stared in shock, Van Pelt rolled her eyes and Cho had his eyebrow raised slightly in surprise.

He almost told them however, that they couldn't have her in any impromptu fantasies, sex related or not because she was his-but within the confines of his own heart, he realized just how wonderful that sounded.

Moreover, in the confines of his mind, he realized just how wrong that sounded.

**OoO**

She was a _fantasy_.

Did that mean he fantasized about her?

Oh dear god, she hoped not-it was bad enough she had dreams dealing with Rigsby (whom Lisbon was going to put on desk duty for about a month for his inappropriate comment) but it was also bad enough, that she had dreams about Jane.

It usually involved them, a twister game board of some sort and her always winning in her office-both of them fully clothed, of course; then she awoke in her large bed alone, somewhat disappointed that she hadn't gotten any further than pinning him down to the color dotted map-apparently dream fantasies weren't as much fun if they weren't reenacted in real life.

However, one thing _was _for sure.

Jane had noticed the lack of cross around her neck this morning; it was evident from the surprise written across his features before he tried to mask it behind indifference. She let a small smile grace her lips, even as her phone rang reminding her of the meeting she had with Hightower in an hour and a date later that night.


	5. 1234

**Red Silences**

Thank you to **Frogster**, **p****hoenixmagic1**, **zombienath** and **Jisbon4ever** for their reviews, and to all the alerters and readers of this story as well.

I should say that while most of the chapters don't deal with angst directly just yet, we're getting there...slowly, but surely. :D Enjoy!

* * *

**Chapter Five:**

**1234**

It were times like these that she wished she could chain the man to a desk, and make him stay there until he learned a lesson, personally, she didn't care what lesson he learned but all she knew was that within the agenda of learning those lessons, she wanted him to learn why cheating his boss was immoral.

"…I should toss you out a window." Lisbon muttered, as Jane passed GO for the tenth time in twenty minutes. "There's no way…"  
"Oh have faith, Lisbon." Jane stated with a grin, as he collected his two hundred dollars from the bank. "Would I ever cheat you?" Lisbon resisted the urge to roll her eyes.  
"Yes." Jane pouted.  
"I should be offended." Jane responded with his blue-green eyes glued to her green ones. "It's not my fault you can't play Monopoly." She raised her eyebrow as she rolled the dice, double sixes.

Lisbon moved her dog token forward twelve spaces before landing on Park Palace, her eyes scanned Jane's long extensive property cards he kept by his side, next to his pile of (cheated) Monopoly money; in fact, Lisbon had no idea what had prompted her to play monopoly with the man besides the fact that he had shown up after work, held out the box and said:  
"I promise not to cheat."  
Yeah right, she should have known better than to play with a man who went into casinos and was kicked out for winning loads of money.

However, it happened to be much better than the laundry she still needed to do.

"Do you want to buy it?" Jane asked, Lisbon shook her head and she rolled the dice again, her dice totaling four, she moved her token past GO to collect the two-hundred dollars before he grabbed the dice to roll his third set of doubles, as she told him she didn't want to buy the property she landed on. "I get to visit Jake the Jailbird."  
"Don't get too excited." Lisbon commented dryly, as Jane peered at her. "I might actually have to arrest you."  
"Meh," Jane threw the idea off, which made Lisbon laugh. "You go to jail twice in your life; you rarely want to go back." Jane moved his shoe token to the orange JAIL square.  
"Tell that to all of our re-convicted felons," Lisbon added. "They seem to like coming back."  
"Maybe it's just to catch a glimpse of you." Jane flirted, and Lisbon couldn't reframe from rolling her eyes in aspiration at the idea of the cheesy pick-up line from the man who could flirt with any woman with a bag over his face.  
"Sure." Lisbon commented in response. "So is that why we have an increase in female prisoners?" Jane glanced up at her as she rolled the dice.  
"For you?" Jane asked. "I guess it's possible." Lisbon paused in moving her token to glance up at him. "But I'd like to think that most of those women there are for me." Lisbon hit him on the shoulder lightly, which caused him to fall from his chair. "I should call the police on you." Jane pulled himself back in his seat, his eyes narrowed toward Lisbon.  
"Jane, they'd send me." Lisbon responded. "I'm not about to arrest myself."  
"I'll arrest you." Jane stated, suddenly. "Give me your handcuffs, and I'll chain your wrists to the bedpost…" He trailed off, and the room grew silent as Lisbon dropped her jaw in shock. "Get your mind out of the gutter woman."  
"Hey, my mind was never there." Lisbon defended as Jane smirked. "You were the one thinking about tying me to a bedpost." Jane raised his eyebrow again, and rolled the dice to end up with a total of three.  
"Do you see what you've done to me woman?" Jane asked, annoyed. "You've managed to make me throw a perfect game."  
"Don't woman me." Lisbon chided with a glare. "…and you were cheating anyway." Jane leaned over the game board, his lips inches away from hers and she felt his warm breath ticking her face.

**OoO**

Jane smirked as he pulled away and reached for the bank by Lisbon's arm, only to be smacked across the face.

"Hey!"  
"Don't steal from the bank!"  
"I wasn't!"  
"So help me God, I will arrest you."  
"...On what charges?" Jane asked, with a smirk again. "Theft of a fictional character's money? I doubt that'll…!" Lisbon glanced at him before she rushed from her chair to tackle him to the ground, he hit the ground painfully and she laughed as both of them rolled around on the empty space, playfully fighting.

Eventually, the fighting stopped as he had his arms tightly wrapped around her back and both of their lips within inches of a proper kissing distance.

She leaned forward as if she were about to kiss him, and he closed his eyes.

"If you cheat again," she breathed into his ear, her hot breath lingering on his earlobe which made him feel something that he shouldn't feel, especially when his boss was on top of him. "I'll make you do my all of my paperwork for the next." He let her go, and she crawled off him as he hastily sat up and gave the excuse that he needed to use the bathroom, she nodded and he ran up the stairs.

It was a strange feeling, Jane supposed, as he paced around in Lisbon's upstairs bathroom. He had never even felt the stirrings of sexual arousal with Kristina Fyre; she was nice to look at yes, but her personality…it left much to be desired.

Jane wondered though, if that was how Lisbon saw him.

Lisbon obviously had liked Bosco at some point, and no offense to the man six feet under-but Bosco didn't have much of a killer personality (and his looks, well…he wouldn't win the award for the best looking, anytime soon) plus he had once been married, which Jane didn't think Lisbon was into polygamy.  
However, Mashborn liked her too-and obviously, that didn't turn out so well for her _damaged intensity_.

"You alright, Jane?" Lisbon called, and with a heavy sigh and a flush of the toilet (he hadn't even used) he opened the door to head back downstairs, careful to avoid the dark haired woman's worried stare.


	6. You'll Think of Me

**Red Silences**

Thank you to **Jisbon4ever **and **Zombienash** for the wonderful reviews, as well as all the alerters and readers of this story so far.

* * *

**Chapter Six:  
****You'll Think of Me**

Work, for the past four days or so had been completely unadventurous and it left Jane bored; he didn't exactly want anyone to die but there had to be something that they could do to pass time until their next case.  
Unfortunately, the AC unit had broken due to Jane's…tinkering with the controls and they were in the middle of a July heat wave which meant the whole unit had their windows open to catch whatever breeze they could find.

Jane, currently was on the end of several glares from disgruntled employees who weren't being paid enough to sit in a sweltering hot building all day but they did so not to send Hightower's wrath on Lisbon, but if Hightower asked why everyone had switched from their extremely professional clothes for shirts and shorts at the moment, they'd blame Jane.

"Ugh." Rigsby responded from his desk. "Jane, if you ever fiddle with any controls again…I'll break your fingers."  
"Duly noted." Jane responded back with a small smile. "It could be worse." Van Pelt groaned, before she shot a glare at Jane.  
"How?"  
"I…" He paused at the entry of a strawberry blonde haired male, dressed smartly in a pristine suit, a blue tie and who held a briefcase in his hands. Van Pelt glanced at the male, who gave her a small shy smile, which she returned, brightly.  
"How can I help you?" Van Pelt asked.  
"I'm here to see Teresa Lisbon." Van Pelt nodded, and stood from her desk to tell the senior agent that she had a visitor. Jane didn't pay any attention to the man, as from the first glance he looked as if he worked for the AG's office and anything that happened in the SCU office was work related, not personal related; he heard Lisbon's footsteps and he peered at her as the man smiled lightly at her. "Ready for lunch?" Lisbon smiled softly in return.  
"Yeah, I think I'm about finished." She responded, and the man did something Jane wasn't expecting-he bent forward and kissed Lisbon on the cheek; he expected her to hit him back or pull away but instead, she leaned into him and Jane knew, this wasn't an AG…this was Lisbon's boyfriend.

Jane shot off his couch in surprise, and Lisbon glanced at him, as did the man, who towered protectively above Lisbon.

"Who is this?" Jane asked, and Lisbon ignored him. "Lisbon?" The man stepped forward and glanced over his shoulder at the grimacing Lisbon.  
"Is this the consultant you were telling me about?" The man asked, and Lisbon nodded as he turned his head back around, his hazel eyes meeting Jane's gaze head on. "I'm Rhys Damien." Rhys held his hand out for Jane to shake, which Jane ignored.  
"You're her boyfriend?" Rhys opened his mouth to respond, when Lisbon interrupted his response.  
"We need to get going," Lisbon told him quietly. "I need to be back at work by 2." Rhys nodded, and he grabbed Lisbon's hand, which confirmed to Jane that the both of them were dating.  
"It's nice to be able to finally meet all of you," Rhys responded, with a bright smile. "Teresa has told me so much." Cho glanced up from his Sudoku puzzle, Rigsby opened his eyes to peek at the man and Van Pelt smiled. Rhys led the two out and Van Pelt turned to stare at Rigsby, a smile on her face.  
"I'm so glad the boss is dating." Van Pelt gushed, and Jane rolled his eyes.  
"It'll blow over." Jane responded. "Lisbon needs her work more than she needs some fake guy." Cho shrugged.  
"I don't know about that Jane," Rigsby gave. "Lisbon's been happier lately, and I doubt it's because you've been here less and less." Jane wanted to tell the dark haired agent that Lisbon was happier because she had been spending more time with him lately, and not some boy who just pretended to be a man.  
"She can't be dating." Jane argued, and Cho shook his head.  
"He kissed her on the cheek, and held her hand." Cho responded. "It sounds like a date to me."  
"No." Jane argued. "Lisbon would have told me..." Van Pelt glanced at him, her eyebrow raised as she took her fingers from the keyboard to respond.  
"Jane, Lisbon doesn't tell you everything."  
"We've been spending more and more time around each other." Jane defended; he crossed his arms against his chest in a pout as Van Pelt sighed.  
"I don't know why you think that just because you spend almost every moment at work together immediately puts you both at the level of soul mates." Van Pelt told him. "It just means Lisbon respects you, and you like her as a friend." Jane frowned.  
"Can you do me a favor then?" Van Pelt raised her eyebrow.  
"It depends."  
"Can you do a background check on...?" Jane ducked the stapler that came from the direction of Van Pelt with an innocent grin. "I just wanted to protect our Lisbon."  
"I'm not about to do a background on Lisbon's boyfriend." Van Pelt chided, and Jane sunk back down on the leather couch with his arms crossed. "It would be an improper use of the station's equipment."  
"You did a background check on Rigsby's..." Van Pelt shot him a furious glare, to which Rigsby glanced at Van Pelt in surprise. "...at the risk of dying, I refuse to finish this sentence."  
"Good choice." Van Pelt congratulated. "Very good choice."

Jane decided he'd just have to confront Lisbon after she returned from her lunch break with her new _boyfriend_, Rhys Damien.

He refused however, to sit in her office until she returned; he grabbed his suit jacket from behind the armrest of the couch and left the bullpen, ignoring the curious glances of his coworkers.

He needed to get out.  
He needed to leave.  
He needed to _think_.

Jane slid his keys from his jacket, opened the door to his blue DS and sunk down into the driver's seat, the door slamming behind him.

**OoO**

Her lunch date with Rhys had gone off without a hitch, but this was only her fifth date with the man and she didn't want to rush it because she wasn't sure what it was that she exactly wanted but she knew she wanted a stable relationship with someone who wasn't damaged.  
Lisbon sat her purse down into the bottom drawer of her desk, and waited for Jane to come bursting in her office, demanding answers.

After thirty minutes however, it was clear he wasn't going to return and with a weary feeling, she trekked her way to Hightower's office for yet again another meeting.


	7. Californication

**Red Silences**

Thanks to **Jisbon4ever**, **Anna**, **A-B-C-Dream**, and **Frogster **for the reviews! Also much thanks to all the alerters and readers of this story, so far!

I've also decided to post chapters 7, 8, 9 due to the length of each chapter :)

**Chapter Seven:**

**Californication**

He couldn't bring himself to go into work for a week, he used some of the saved up vacation time from two years (it didn't include the suspension time from years ago either) and he spent most of that time on the beach; building sandcastles, surfing, reading and avoiding Lisbon. Jane knew he was being childish, especially as Lisbon would call and he would let the phone ring for minutes on end, before the room fell silent and he would stare up at the ceiling of the five-star hotel room far away from Sacramento, in those moments, he could only let himself fall into the void of the unknown as he tried to make his heart and mind make sense of the whole thing.

Lisbon had a boyfriend, who wasn't Patrick Jane.

He wasn't jealous though, he knew Lisbon deserved happiness; so then why did he find it hard to think about anyone else but him being next to the dark haired woman?

On his last day of vacationing, he ghosted the gift shop and found something for Lisbon-the least he could do was apologize for his appalling behavior.

**OoO**

"Where the _hell _have you been?"  
"Vacation, you know that place where people relax from work?" Jane asked with a bright smile. "You should give it a try sometime; take your boyfriend with you…" Lisbon sighed.  
"If this has something to do about Rhys…"  
"Look, I'm happy for you." Jane pressed forward. "I am."  
"But…?"  
"There aren't any buts." Jane replied, softly. "I just want you happy, and if Rhys does that-I'm happy for you." Lisbon didn't respond back for a few moments, which gave Jane the opportunity to slip his hands in his suit jacket and pull out the small little box, Lisbon eyed it. "This is an apology for my behavior." Lisbon shook her head. "We both know you'll accept it, Lisbon." Lisbon nodded, and gingerly took the box from its owner before opening it to find a small little silver charm of a badge which made her laugh. "I figured you might appreciate that, especially after our Monopoly game the other night." Lisbon nodded, and Jane stood with a small smile. "Can I…?" It was then he noticed that the silver chain had once more been replaced with the cross. "Oh, never mind."

He felt a lump in his throat, and he pulled away from her as he sat back down on the couch.  
"Jane, I…"  
"I understand, Lisbon." Jane responded. "I really do." He waved it off with a smaller smile. "You don't want your new boyfriend to get any ideas." Lisbon crossed her arms against her chest.  
"This is ridiculous, and you are being childish." Lisbon muttered, as she handed his gift back to him and turned on her heel to head back toward her office without even giving Jane a second glance as the question hung in the silence between the two.

It didn't mean however, that he wasn't going to do everything in his power to make Lisbon realize her mistake in choosing someone like Rhys Damien.


	8. Private Eyes

**Red Silences**

I'm just going to add that I really don't own anything besides four characters, and you've met one of those four characters.

**Chapter Eight:**

**Private Eyes**

Another late night of paperwork, which left Lisbon at her desk while Jane, she guessed was out on the couch sleeping.  
The last few weeks had been crazy enough, it seemed like Jane was becoming more and more restless which meant more and more paperwork for her, the more paperwork equaled later nights for her, which meant less sleep and less slept meant more chances of anger toward her unit.

Jane had been trying his best to allow Lisbon breathing room, but sometimes-his idea of breathing room consisted of watching her from afar; she let a sigh pass from her lips and burrowed her head into her arms on top of her piles of paperwork.

At least July was almost over, and August would be here soon.

Lisbon's breathing slowed, and eventually her eyes closed and she fell into a slumber.

**OoO**

Jane awoke to the sound of silence, and with a glance at the clock on the wall that told him it was 3:42 in the morning; he glanced around to see if Lisbon were still around or not but he remembered that he couldn't see her from his lying position on the couch, he had to move and he did so quietly, only to find her, her head buried into her bare arms to which he stood at the door to her office watching her peacefully slumber.  
He knew he should probably wake her, as come work in the morning, her neck would be sore but he couldn't bring himself to wake her, as she needed the sleep.

He was about to turn and walk away when he heard her voice, soft and sensual drift into the silence.

"…_was my entire fault…"_ Jane frowned; did the both of them suffer from talking in their sleep? "…_still be alive…" _

From the phrases Lisbon had carelessly allowed to escape her lips, Jane knew that she was dreaming about Bosco; he wondered if she had nightmares as he had when his wife and daughter had been murdered, or did she just revisit the scenario in her head? Jane paused for a few more moments to see if the dark haired agent would say something else, and when she didn't, he decided to let her sleep.

After all, Jane knew…sleep was a precious thing to waste.

With a heavy heart, he resigned himself back to his own leather couch to keep vigil through morning.


	9. Oh What a Night

**Red Silences**

Oh no, the last chapter before the angst begins! :) *cough, cough* I mean...

**Chapter Nine:  
****Oh What a Night**

"I want a full lockdown on the building." Hightower ordered Lisbon and her unit, her eyes piercing each one of them. "No one leaves until we're sure that we've caught whoever did this…" Jane reclined on the couch as Hightower continued to shout orders as she left the bullpen, someone had purposely gone into Lisbon's office and trashed it completely which left Hightower pissed, as some of the files in Lisbon's office were highly confidential dealing with court cases.

At least, Jane thought with a small smirk, the AC unit was working again. It had been fixed while he had been on his weeklong vacation and people were no longer going about the building dressed in clothing way under professional standards, which made Jane grin.

"How long do you think we'll be in here?" Rigsby questioned to Van Pelt, who shrugged.  
"It depends," Van Pelt offered. "Could be all night." Jane glanced at the clock on the brick wall and sighed, it was only 6 in the afternoon. "Who knows, this is Hightower after-all."  
"None of the files were stolen." Lisbon replied, as she leaned against Van Pelt's tidy desk. "It just seems like someone was having fun in my office."  
"Someone?" Jane piped up from his section of the room. "It could be something…"  
"Oh yes, because someone is able to get a dinosaur through security." Lisbon sarcastically replied. "Seriously, Jane?"  
"I never said a dinosaur, you said that," Jane argued with his bright smile pointed in her direction. "I just said something and a something can be an anything-for example, a something could be a vengeful ghost."  
"You don't believe in ghosts though…"  
"You're right," Jane agreed with Van Pelt, who stared at him. "However, you do-so it could have been a ghost, right?"  
"I don't care what it was." Lisbon stated. "I just want to go home." Jane bit his tongue, if he said some offhand comment about Lisbon's boyfriend, Lisbon would go back to ignoring him for another two days and he didn't want that.  
"I could sneak us out." Jane play whispered, and Lisbon rolled her eyes.  
"…and be blamed for ransacking my own office, I think not."  
"Lisbon!" Jane whined. "Why would you be blamed?" Lisbon raised her eyebrow in response, and he nodded. "Oh yeah…"  
"I think I'm going to go ahead back into the office." Lisbon told her team, and they all nodded. "Jane? I need to speak with you."

This time, Rigsby stayed quiet in case Lisbon tried to press anymore desk duty jobs on him.

**OoO**

"Did you do this?" She asked, as soon as the two were in her office with her behind her desk and Jane on the red couch. He shook his head.  
"Now, why would I destroy your office?"  
"Jane, you like to do things for reasons I can't quite explain or understand."  
"I have no reason to destroy it, I know your passwords and I know where you keep your stash of things…" Lisbon glared at him. "It's not like you're actually security conscious…"  
"I am, but that's not the point." She argued. "You have no right breaking into my email!"  
"You're hiding something." It wasn't a question.  
"No."  
"Yes, you are." Jane responded. "If you weren't, you would let me see…"  
"Why don't you ask Van Pelt to see her email?" Lisbon questioned, slightly annoyed.  
"I don't want to see the countless amounts of love letters that she and Rigsby have passed back and forth over the past few months." Jane pulled a face. "So, what do you have on your computer that is so important?"  
"Nothing, and for future reference—love letters are strictly against..."  
"Codes, I know and…are you secretly selling drugs using your email?" Lisbon stared at Jane as if he had suddenly grown a third head.  
"Are you crazy?" She shot back. "I just want privacy, and you act like that's a bad thing." Jane didn't respond, and he stood from his spot on the couch. "I'll ask you again, did you…?"

She didn't get any further, as he closed the distance between the both of them and placed the pads of his thumbs on her cheeks while he leaned across her ransacked desk.  
"I told you," He muttered, blue-green eyes meeting green. "I didn't do it."  
"How can I believe you?" Lisbon asked, and Jane smiled softly as he leaned in to where their lips could touch only to be interrupted.  
"Hey, boss!" Rigsby called, and Lisbon almost groaned. "Hightower needs you in her office."  
"I'll be right there." Lisbon cried back in response before she lowered her voice. "I don't know why that woman can't just call me," and she pulled away from her blonde haired consultant with a sad smile. "I'll be back." She left the office, and Jane didn't follow her as he collapsed onto her couch.

**OoO**

His heart pounded against his ribs, as he watched the woman leave-his green-blue eyes glued to her backside as she left the office.

Had he been about to kiss her?  
Did she think that he was about to?

Probably not, on both counts.

Jane had been trying to prove a point, not seduce his boss or something along those lines and as for Lisbon thinking he was going to kiss her, she probably just thought he was being his normal, slightly eccentric self.

"They caught him." Lisbon told him, as she poked her head back into the office—he noticed she wasn't blushing, or wearing the chain he had given her once more. "I'm sorry for accusing you."  
"It's okay." Jane replied softly, and Lisbon glanced at him.  
"Are you alright?"  
"I'm just fine." Lisbon nodded, and left him alone in a world of his own lies.

If anything, his heart however, knew what he had to do; even if that meant he had to leave the CBI, indefinitely.

Even if he had to leave Lisbon, he noted to himself to talk with Hightower first thing in the morning.


	10. Nothing Lasts Forever

**Red Silences**

I want to thank **Jisbon4ever**, **Zombienath**, **lucy**, **Anna**,and **A-B-C****-Dream** for the reviews, as well as the alerters and readers of this story.

I also want to make an announcement, :) I'm offering three one-thousand word oneshots and/or a fanfic of 5,000+ words over at the Gulf Aid Now Charity on Livejournal. The bidding currently is for $3, and it ends on July 5th, 2010. If you'd like me to write you something, please visit my author's profile for the link.

* * *

**Chapter Ten:**

**Nothing Lasts Forever**

The mandatory therapy sessions demanded by the bureau after Red John had shot three, and killed two in front of him had helped to a certain extent, but after two sessions, the bureau had decided that Jane was _perfectly_ fine and had allowed him to be signed off on.  
Lisbon had known, that as Jane had handed him her form and had given her a simple smile that things weren't going to that simple; mental traumas such as being kidnapped, or torture or watching anyone die and not being able to do anything about it left a mark, a darkness upon the heart which could turn a man onto the path of evil, if he so desired.

Jane was a wild cannon, which literally scared her-especially after his suicidal attempt a few weeks ago, if the man was willing to run a blade through his own abdomen, it was obvious that the man wasn't healed from his run in with Red John and it was also _extremely_ obvious that the man would do anything to get what he wanted.

Hightower had acted as if Jane would never become a danger to his self, but people did things they weren't supposed to and Lisbon thought that Hightower, out of everyone should know that better than most of the idiotic people who worked in the bureau.

"Agent Hightower?" Madeline Hightower stood in the doorway to Lisbon's office, papers in her hand. "Ma'am?"  
"I'm sorry, Lisbon." Hightower explained, as she handed the bundle of papers to the senior agent. "I couldn't stop it." Lisbon doubted that, her eyes glancing down toward the papers, if Hightower had wanted to stop Patrick Jane from resigning…she would have, she could have done so, but she chose not to.  
"Did he tell you why?"  
"No."  
"So, he just left?" Lisbon asked, as she didn't believe that at all-Jane wasn't one to leave her without saying goodbye.  
"Yes."  
Lisbon pulled out her cell phone from the drawer of her desk, and dialed Jane's number as she continued to ignore Hightower's stare.

**OoO**

The shrill ringing of a phone broke the eerie red silence, red tinted water cascading down the broken windows lined up against the brick wall, the blood red curtains still; as a shoulder length haired blonde leaned back in a dark green leather chair, his hands placed together on the neatly organized mahogany desk with a dark and slightly crooked smile as his steel blue eyes pierced the black laptop before him.

"_We will be together, my love." _

The jaded, hallowed laugh filled the almost silence, as he moved to shove the phone off the desk, where it landed on the concrete floor, immediately silencing upon impact.


	11. Heart of Life

**Red Silences**

I want to thank **lucy**, **lisbon69**, **IntoDarkness**, and **zombienath** for the reviews, I also want to thank all the alerters and the readers of this story so far. (I like thanking people, just in case you couldn't tell.)

* * *

**Chapter Eleven:**

**Heart of Life**

"…and then, he resigned." Lisbon finished, as she and Rhys sat in her living room with Chinese takeout, spread out between them on the square coffee table. Rhys stared at her, a frown working across his face. "I'm sorry, you must think…" Rhys shook his head.

"When we started this relationship, you made two things perfectly clear to me." Rhys told her. "Your career is important, and I understand that and secondly, you are a woman in an almost always man-domineered career."

"I…he…we're close." Lisbon admitted, after a few moments of complete silence. "I don't understand why he wouldn't tell me."

"Pride, perhaps?" Rhys asked. "After all, goodbyes are the hardest things to say."

"What if Alyson suddenly disappeared without even a hint of a goodbye?" Alyson was Rhys best female friend, whom Lisbon had heard about but hadn't met yet; Rhys blinked before he chuckled.  
"It wouldn't happen," he told her laughing. "Alyson feels the need to tell me everything…"

"But what if it did?"

"I'd hunt her down." Rhys answered, in all seriousness. "She's my best friend, and it's my job to protect her." Rhys statement stuck a cord in Lisbon, should she really be sitting here with her boyfriend of four weeks when she could be out hunting for an answer on why Jane left? "Have you tried to call him?" Lisbon nodded.

"He ignored the call."

"Have you tried since then?"

"No…" She trailed off, and Rhys raised his eyebrow in response. "Things at work have been busy and…"

"You're afraid?" He asked her. "Teresa Lisbon is afraid?" Lisbon laughed and he grinned. "For a woman who can supposedly tackle men twice her size, calling him shouldn't be a huge issue."  
"I just wouldn't know what to say," she responded, softly. "I can't just call and ask him why."

"Then tell him why you need him." Rhys suggested. "If you tell him, he might come back." Lisbon shook her head.

"Hightower won't let him come back; it is part of the new contract he had to sign after Minelli left office." Lisbon answered.

"That's strange; did your contract have that clause?"

"No, but then again…" Lisbon stated. "I don't have an issue with threatening to leave every six months or so."

"So…either Hightower is using this to her advantage." Rhys pointed out, as he waved his chopsticks in his hand. "Or, something else is going on."

"Like?"

"I might be a self-identified cynic but Alyson could definitely come up with a few stray ideas." Rhys joked. "She's always been the more…interesting one of the both of us." Lisbon laughed again. "By the way, she wants to meet you." Lisbon turned her head slightly to stare at him, hazel eyes sparkling in good nature.

"You're kidding?"

"Nope," Rhys responded. "I love her to death, but sometimes she can be a little insane."

"Her ideas?"

"Exactly, she likes the happier me though." Rhys leaned forward to place a kiss on Lisbon's lips, to which she pulled back with a slight frown.

"I'm sorry…"

"No, it's alright." Rhys accepted. "Would you like to watch a movie?" Lisbon nodded, as she resolved to try to call Jane's phone again later.

**OoO**

Lisbon sunk down onto the couch after he left, exhaustion claiming her weary body from the last few days of work; if it wasn't the insane amount of paperwork that she had been battling from before Jane had left two days ago, it was the increasing amount of homicides that kept her running on barely two hours of sleep and beyond the recommended dose of caffeine each day.

She allowed her eyelids to close, and leaned her head back on the couch to calm her churning stomach, which had been why Rhys had left; halfway through the movie she had lost her stomach's contents into the toilet.

"Have you eaten lately?" Rhys had asked her, which she had ignored in favor to continue to empty the contents of her stomach into the porcelain bowl. "Teresa…"

"I'm fine," she muttered, as she wiped her hand across her mouth. "The food just disagreed with my stomach."

"…probably because you haven't eaten in awhile."

"I ate yesterday." If she did, she couldn't remember what she had-things had been hectic.

"I'm going to go ahead and leave, alright?" He asked and she had somehow managed to carry herself to the door and see him out before she herself had collapsed on the couch in exhaustion.

Sleep weighed down heavily upon her, but she needed to call Jane once again which had her fingers against the cool plastic of the cell phone to dial the familiar number and hold it to her ear, her stomach still churning.  
The phone rang several times, before switching straight to voicemail and Lisbon allowed the comforts to listen to his soothing voice, her eyes closing.

_"I'm not here at the moment, leave a message and I'll get back to you as soon as possible." _  
The beep, and then she sat in the silence of her home as she wondered if she really wanted to leave him a message, but what could it hurt.

"Jane, we…uh…I want to know why you left, call me back when you get this message." Lisbon hit the button to end the call, and closed her eyes.

**OoO**

The steps leading to and from Lisbon's home were pure white concrete, which made it somewhat easier for Rhys to climb down as he kissed his girlfriend goodnight and she shut the door behind him with a soft smile.  
He considered himself, at the current moment, the luckiest man alive-he had a beautiful girlfriend, a wonderful family, an amazing job and the best friend he could ever ask for in the world but he knew, he wouldn't have a beautiful girlfriend for much longer because said beautiful girlfriend's heart belonged to another man, he had known that from the very beginning of their relationship and he didn't mind it, in fact-he had been in the same situation for three years with someone else once.

Rhys held his sleek silver cell phone in his hands, and dialed Alyson's number, which went straight through to her voicemail.

He had almost ended the call when something heavy collided with the back of his head, with the phone dropping from his hand, he fell into the darkness.


	12. Lithium

**Red Silences**

Thanks to **lisbon69**, **A-B-C-Dream**, and **Jisbon4Ever **for the reviews, as well as thank you to all the alerters and readers of the story so far.

* * *

**Chapter Twelve:**

**Lithium**

She threw her phone down on her unorganized desk in frustration. Rhys wasn't answering her calls.

Lisbon wondered if maybe, she had done something wrong by not letting him kiss her or by getting sick.  
Some of the guys she had dated back in college who had no desire to see her again ignored her and pretended she didn't exist at all but she had at least figured that Rhys, would have been more mature than that by telling her that he didn't want to date anymore.

"Boss?" Rigsby interrupted her thoughts, and she glanced up at him from her paperwork.

"Yes?"

"Someone is here to see you." Lisbon nodded, and from Rigsby's relaxed stance and demeanor-she determined it wasn't Rhys or even Jane wanting to see her. It was someone else. Lisbon stood from her black chair and strolled from her office to meet whoever stood out in the bullpen waiting to speak to her. Lisbon caught sight of the slightly tall blue eyed, shoulder length brunette female who wore dark jeans, a tie-dyed shirt and stood impatiently, her eyes glued to her cell phone in an almost nervous behavior while she nibbled on her lip. "Yes?"

"Teresa Lisbon?"

"Yes." Lisbon repeated.

"Rhys girlfriend?" Lisbon nodded, how did this woman know…?

"I'm Alyson Loveland." Lisbon stared at the morose woman in surprise; this was Rhys' best friend? For some reason, she imagined the woman to be more hyperactive. "I wish we were meeting under happier circumstances, but…I didn't know where else to go and…" She paused, as she continued to nibble on her lip.

"Alyson…"

"Rhys is missing!" Alyson blurted into the commotion-filled room, and Lisbon grew silent as Van Pelt stared with her brown eyes at the both of them.

"Ma'am, we don't deal with missing persons…." Van Pelt began.

"I know that!" Alyson sobbed. "But he's my best friend!"

"Alyson, you need to calm down and tell me what happened."

"If I had just answered my phone…" She sobbed again. "He left a message." She handed her phone to Lisbon, who immediately placed the phone on speaker and played the message for the members of her unit to hear.

_"Hey Al, I'm leaving Teresa's now. I'll be there in about fifteen minutes, if I'm not there in thirty, feel free to panic." _Rhys voice boomed into the room, laughter echoing until the laughter abruptly disappeared and the residents of the room were left to torture. _"…wait, what are you doing here?"_ Silence. Lisbon glanced at the brown-haired woman, who seemed to be barely keeping herself together and she knew immediately, this wasn't a joke; though Rhys had said that Alyson had an interesting way of using her imagination, she doubted Alyson would go around and make tales involving her best friend being kidnapped to the police.

"He never made it home last night," Alyson, explained, which Lisbon raised her eyebrow and the brunette scowled in response. "We've been best friends for eight years, so yeah, we live together and he always makes it a point to call me if he's running late."

"Maybe he got abducted by aliens." Rigsby muttered, and Alyson calmly blinked.

"I thought hypnotism." Alyson admitted, sheepishly.

"Eh, anything's possible." Rigsby muttered, which had a smile out of Van Pelt.

"We officially can't do anything until forty-eight hours pass." Lisbon informed the brunette, who was slowly becoming more outraged.

"He's your boyfriend," Alyson shrieked. "You would think that you of all people would care."

"I do." Lisbon admitted with a frown across her face. "But I work Serious Crimes, not missing persons."

"Is there anything I can do?" The brunette hissed and Lisbon nodded.

"Go home; wait another twenty-four hours and then come back and report it." Lisbon began to turn around to head back toward her office when the brunette's whispered words stopped her.

"What if he's dead by then?"

It were the times like these that Lisbon hated about the justice system, the chances that if someone had been kidnapped and survived past the first twenty-four hours were low to none, the chances for them being alive anywhere beyond forty-eight hours was almost non-existent, Lisbon had a feeling that Alyson knew that also.

"Then we'll do our best to catch the killer or killers."

The raw emotion in her voice was enough to make Alyson nod, and relinquish her phone to the senior agent.

"Just in case," she repeated, softly as Alyson turned and left while Cho glanced at her. "We have no proof that he was kidnapped besides this voicemail."

"We've worked with less before." Cho told her.

"My hands are tied," Lisbon explained. "If Hightower found that I was investigating a missing persons case, when the person hasn't officially been declared missing-I'd lose my job."

"You can't just ignore that," Van Pelt interrupted, which had the senior agent peering at her subordinate. "It's not right."

"Van Pelt, we work for the justice system-we follow the rules, and we all have to follow protocol."

"Oh, so you'd follow protocol if I told you that the last time anyone saw Jane was Wednesday?" Lisbon peered at her, as Van Pelt glanced at her boss. "I thought you might like to know that."

"Wednesday?" Wednesday had been his last day. It was now Monday morning. "That's more than forty-eight hours ago."

"No probable cause to think he's missing." Van Pelt argued, darkly before she frowned. "I understand that we have to follow protocol but if you knew someone was missing twenty-four hours in-wouldn't you want to do everything you can do to bring them back alive?" Lisbon hesitated, she knew that either way she'd live with the regrets but wasn't her career about helping and saving others? If Hightower had an issue with that, then she would quit.

"We've got little to work off of," Lisbon admitted, which had Van Pelt nod in her direction with her fingers ready to start at the keyboard. "But as Cho said, we've had less before."

**OoO**

Lisbon no sooner closed the door to her home behind her before she was leaning against the door, emotions running high and ragged.

"Please, let me find him…let me find them both."

The silent prayer was enough to send her into a frenzy of tears, and when they began—she knew she wouldn't be able to stop them, no matter how hard she tried.


	13. Separate Ways

**Red Silences**

Thanks to **lisbon69**, **Jisbon4ever**, **lucy**, and **zombienash** for the reviews, and of course, thanks to the readers and alerters of this story as well.

I own nothing besides four characters, the plot, and the poems represented in this chapter and the next. : )

* * *

**Chapter Thirteen:**

**Separate Ways**

Unfocused hazel eyes stared straight ahead, as did another set of eyes hidden behind a pair of dark sunglasses as a third man sat across from the both of him, a wine glass in his hand while he eyed them both.

"I think we're going to have a little fun," the man spoke, softly. "You see, I think our lovely Teresa needs to realize her mistake…don't you boys?"

Reluctant, blank nods in response.

"I'm glad you agree with me." He purred. "If you didn't, it would be another intensive round…wouldn't it?"

They nodded again.

"And you don't want that, do you?" He received no nods in response, which made him raise his voice to ask again. "Do you?" They nodded once more and the man settled back against the smooth leather of the dark seat, as the chauffer continued to drive the party of three around.

**OoO**

"Hey, did any of you see who left this on my desk?" Lisbon held up the dark green urn, which she had found on her desk after she had been out all morning searching for leads-Van Pelt shook her head, as did Cho and Rigsby.

"Does it have a message or something?" Lisbon inspected the urn to find a single black card and she nodded, Van Pelt handed her a tissue to which she grabbed and lifted the black card from the message to read it.

_"Loved you once, shame on me.  
Loved you twice, shame on them.  
Loved you third, nonce more._

__

Under control,  
Can you stop it before it starts?  
Do you know who I am?  
i know you, who are.

Saved from the darkness,  
You put your trust in his corrupted soul  
Who will be his next victim?  
Oh, I think I know.

_If she joins our party of three  
It will be a grand soirée."_

Lisbon scoffed at the horrible piece of poetry, was this someone's idea of a practical joke; just last week she had received an envelope full of glass which she had pricked her finger on.  
Her unit awaited her answer and she glanced at them before shrugging.

"I don't know, it doesn't say who it's from."

"Did you open the urn?" Rigsby asked, and Lisbon almost kicked herself-for all she knew, the urn could contain acid or something lethal with careful precision, she placed the urn on the desk that had once belonged to Jane and carefully pulled the lid off.

Instead of ashes or glass, the urn held scarlet.

"Get this to forensics." Lisbon ordered, to which Rigsby nodded and stood from his desk to grab at the urn to rush it off to forensics.

If this was a practical joke, who would send her blood which had the slight metallic smell of a human's?

Six hours later or so, Lisbon would find out—it wasn't a practical joke, in fact the urn held Alyson Loveland's blood.

**OoO**

The home was ransacked, light green sheets slit down the middle stained with the offensive scarlet liquid and as Lisbon stood in the middle of Alyson and Rhys two bedroom apartment for the first time, she realized just how different the two were-Rhys' neatly organized bedroom was surrounded by miles and miles of bookshelves and books from all different topics but Alyson's room was slightly messy, colorful paint splashed on the walls with her neon green laptop displayed proudly on top of her desk.

In fact, Lisbon couldn't understand how two completely different people or rather polar opposites could live together without killing one another—it had been hard enough for her and Jane to work together, without them killing each other (or more rather, for her to not kill him)

"…whatever happened, most likely took place here." Brett Partridge explained, as he pointed toward the bed. "From the looks of the door, she knew her attacker and the entry wasn't forced."

"Do you know if these apartments have cameras?" Lisbon asked and Jack nodded.

"They have cameras toward the main doors." Brett waved his fingers toward Alyson's computer. "If anything, our vic…" Lisbon shot him a dark withering glare. "I mean our kidnapped victim," she ignored his eye roll, because in all honesty-this man was annoying as all hell. "Probably had the feed connected in here, we should be able to see who was at the door."

"I'll get on that boss," Van Pelt responded, moving over to the laptop; after a few moments of antagonizing company, Van Pelt had gotten into the camera feed and had the video displayed on the laptop. "Boss?" Lisbon glanced at her. "This can't be right."

"What do you mean?" Van Pelt bit her lip, before she moved the computer over to show her boss the issue.

"It shows that someone who looks a lot like Rhys Damian came back here…by himself." Van Pelt stared down at the screen, and Lisbon shook her head.

"That's not possible."

"It is though, it took two seconds for Alyson to answer her door-she saw him, and from the looks of the footage…she hugged him, and he pushed her inside, before he follow…wait, this can't be right, either." Lisbon glanced at her. "Come here and look at this." Van Pelt paused the footage to show Lisbon, who merely glanced at Van Pelt in surprise.

"Jane?" Lisbon asked, and Brett glanced at her.

"Oh that doesn't surprise me." Brett commented. "Guy was a total…" Lisbon glared him into silence.

"Jane doesn't even know Alyson." Lisbon muttered with her eyes focused on the screen. "I don't understand how this is possible."

"He's just standing there," Van Pelt explained, as she continued to play the footage. "It's like he doesn't care if he's caught on camera." Lisbon didn't voice her opinion; something about this situation didn't feel quite right.

If Rhys was behind the kidnapping of Alyson Loveland, it didn't quite equal up-Alyson firstly, was his best friend, secondly, why would Jane show up shortly after Rhys had wormed his way into the apartment and third?  
Rhys had to know about the camera, considering that his computer probably had the same camera software that Alyson's did so why didn't either man seem too concerned about being on said camera.

There was no way however, that Jane could be there—considering that Jane wouldn't wear anything other than a three piece suit and the man in their image wore a ratty pair of jeans, and a black hooded sweatshirt.


	14. Violet Hill

**Red Silences**

Thanks to **lucy **for the review, and of course, as always—the readers and alerters of the story—the end of this chapter deals with the same person we've seen from Chapter 10, and the beginning of Chapter 13 (I just wanted to clarify that without giving _too _much away)

* * *

**Chapter Fourteen:**

**Violet Hill**

"Come in," Hightower greeted as Lisbon stepped into the office, her arms down to her sides as she came to stand in front of her bosses' desk. Hightower had her brown eyes focused on her paperwork below her and after a few moments of silence, Hightower allowed her pen to fall from her fingers and hit the desk. "I need you to focus on your other cases at the moment."

"Come again, ma'am?" Hightower blinked.

"You heard me Lisbon," Hightower gave. "I want you to focus on your other cases at the moment, you're slacking." Lisbon brought her arms to rest against her chest, crossing them as she stared down at the Special Agent.

"I can't do that, ma'am." Lisbon allotted, quietly. "We have conclusive evidence that proves that two people have kidnapped…"

"Lisbon, I've seen the report." Hightower interrupted. "However, we have no evidence that proves that Alyson is dead or…" Her phone rang, and she held up her finger to interrupt the disagreement about to come. "Hightower…" Hightower nodded for a few minutes and kept her eyes on Lisbon, which spelled disaster. "I see." Hightower nodded once more. "I'll tell her that, thanks." Hightower hung the phone up and glanced down at her desk before she glanced at Lisbon. "I spoke too soon."

"What do you…?"

"That was my contact in the Anaheim office." Hightower explained. "They need you to get down there right away."

"Why?"

"There's been a murder, and the murderer is asking for _you_."

**OoO**

It wasn't until Rigsby had pulled the SUV past the large blue sign did the sinking feeling hit her again, Disneyland had been another one of those odd coincidences that she couldn't quite ignore especially as what had seemed like forever ago (when in reality it had only been two weeks ago) Jane had confessed to her about his daughter loving Disneyland.

"You think that we might be able to get some cotton candy." Rigsby threw aside and Cho glanced at him.

"Someone died, and you want cotton candy."

"My stomach knows no bounds." Rigsby responded, as he parked the vehicle and the group of four relinquished the comfort of the SUV air conditioning to tackle the early August heat wave.

"Do you know what we have, boss?" Van Pelt asked, as the four crossed the almost ghost-like parking lot of Disneyland.

"I was told to come here, and the officials would fill me in." The four continued in silence, until the four came across the sights of uniformed officers.

"Agent Teresa Lisbon?" One of the many uniformed officers greeted, and she nodded. "Thank you for coming; I'm Officer Jackie Elliston…"

"What do we have here?"

"Jaime Everland, one of the park's employees came into start her shift when she found this…" Jackie answered, as they neared the main square of the nearly deserted theme park except for the uniformed officers who stood around the yellow-taped area. Jackie lifted the tape up for the four to cross, and Lisbon could immediately see why someone had specifically asked for her.

The woman, with her shoulder length dark hair and glossy wide green eyes with her mouth open in a silent scream almost screamed Teresa Lisbon, Rigsby had to do a double take in disbelief as he glanced between his boss and the gory corpse below them all.

"When Everland caught sight of the corpse, she called 911—and the officer on the scene was Ted Kelvin." Lisbon knew why someone would call her from this office then; Ted Kelvin was someone she used to work with back during her SFPD days with Sam Bosco. "He of course called your office, and I can see why now…the resemblance in uncanny."

"Was there anything on the body?" Jackie nodded.

"When the ME swept the area, he found this." Jackie relinquished another black note card, similar to the one that had been shown on the urn. "It was addressed for you, which was another reason why we called your office." Lisbon nodded, and was handed a pair of gloves before handling the note card.

_"Walk Away.  
Walk Away.  
You couldn't save me._

__

I look a lot like you  
Does this frighten you?  
Make you more careful?

Watch the steps you take  
For three is all I have  
Alive, well and working—

For two others will be committed  
Before the eve of dawn's tomorrow,  
Unless you repent for the sins you've taken

_Of loving two men before your time is done." _

"At least we know Red John isn't behind this," Rigsby stated. "I doubt he'd write you something close to love poetry, boss." Lisbon didn't tell Rigsby that Red John had recited a poem to Jane, it's possible for any serial killer to change motive after a while, especially someone who's MO is ripped off all the time; she also couldn't refute the idea that Jane committed this murder, the idea that firstly, they're taken to Disneyland where Jane bought the necklace for his deceased daughter and second, the woman on the concrete ground looked eerily identical to herself.

"What can you tell me about the way she was killed?" Jackie shrugged.

"Our victim, from the ME's reports was beaten to death." Jackie explained. "She was most likely starved for a few days, which means she could have been missing anywhere from two days to a week." Lisbon glanced down at the woman, and wondered if Jane and Rhys were involved.

"Do you know if they have camera footage guarding the park at night?" Jackie nodded.

"They do."

Ten minutes later, the officer and the senior agent remained seated in the security center while Jackie forwarded the tape on the feed from around 7 PM to the time they found the body.

"Here," Jackie revealed and Lisbon focused her eyes on the small screen with a colorful night vision image—at around 2:52 AM, three figures (without any masks) carried the body in.

"Three?" Lisbon asked. "On our kidnap victim's feed there were two…"

"It seems then, whoever is behind this gained another helper." Lisbon knew she had seen all three before, especially as the night vision picked up two males but the last one, Lisbon wasn't sure if the person were a female or male.

"Would you like a copy of this, ma'am?"

"Yes, I would."

**OoO**

Terror was something many people never truly felt, and fear was something that made someone frightened for the moment but eventually, that fear faded into adrenaline however, terror remained behind. Three figures huddled together for warmth, terror oozing from themselves in the form of lack of control from their bladders.  
The door clattered open, and the figures shivered—clothes dingy, scarlet stained and slightly soiled.

"Congratulations to the three of you, especially our new recruit." The figures didn't respond. "I think you deserve a reward for a job well done." The newest recruit stared up at the man with blank eyes. "Come along," the newest recruit pulled themselves up from the other two figures and grabbed the gloved hand of the man as he led her along with the soft mummers of cold comfort.


	15. 9 Crimes

**Red Silences**

Thanks to **lisbon69 **for the reviews! (and of course, a huge thanks goes to the readers and alerters as well)

* * *

**Chapter Fifteen:**

**9 Crimes**

_Repent._

The word haunted her, though she had never been overly religious as a child she often heard the word used whenever her parents had taken her to church; the preacher had used it in the context that if you repented your sins, God would forgive you and at that time, Lisbon hadn't been particularly interested in what exactly the word repent meant though she knew what it meant now, it meant to feel remorse for what one has done or failed to do.

She guided her eyes down to the black card, written in white ink as she sat behind her own desk waiting to hear something back from anyone about one of the multiple cases she had tried to handle for the day, but she found that as she stared at the files—her mind kept wandering back to the poem, and especially the three murders that had occurred throughout the course of eight hours, all the victims women with dark hair and green eyes.  
She was supposed to repent her sins, and by sins—whoever was behind this thought her sin was that she loved two men at the same time, however, she didn't love anyone besides her family. She was interrupted from her thoughts by the ringing of her cell phone, which she hastily answered.

"Lisbon." She greeted, leaning back in her black desk chair but she quickly sat up at ragged breathing. "Hello?"

_"Lisbon…"_ Jane's voice rasped through the phone, causing her to shoot out of her chair in shock.

"Jane?"

_"I need you to listen to me."_ His voice was no longer full of the childish humor she had grown to love; instead, his voice was full of grave seriousness. Lisbon jolted from her office out to the bullpen to where Cho, Van Pelt and Rigsby were lightly talking about something. Van Pelt glanced up at her as Lisbon moved her hand toward the phone, which had the redheaded agent nodding in response as she moved toward the computer, and began to do a search on Jane's location; Lisbon knew she had to keep him on the phone for at least two minutes to lock in on the location.

"What's going on?"

_"I need you to come; I need you to come save me." _Jane's breathy voice whispered._"I'm…"_

"Jane, where are you?"

_"I…I …"_

"Jane, are you alright?"

_"Teresa, please…don't waste anymore time."_ Her name through his lips caused a tingle of panic to shoot down her spine; Jane never usually used her first name except for undercover assignments which meant the situation was even more serious.

"Tell me, what happened?"

_"I was forced to quit."_ He rasped. _"The knife was forced through me by someone else." _Lisbon raised her eyebrow._"I was forced to do all of this, because I'm a sinner who doesn't deserve you…"_

"What do you mean?"

_"Teresa, I'm sorry I've got to go…" _She heard movement, and then nothing as she prided her phone away from her ear to stare at her unit in confusion.

"I've got it." Van Pelt told her, as she repeatedly made keystrokes on her keyboard. "He's currently in a warehouse somewhere in Anaheim but I can't quite lock in on the address." Lisbon stared at her in surprise.

"Jane can't be behind this then." Lisbon argued, and Van Pelt shook her head.

"Something about this doesn't seem quite right." Van Pelt gave. "Jane calls you, and then gets off just past two minutes?"

"Van Pelt, we have to save him."

"Boss, what if this is a trap?"

"It's not." Lisbon responded. "Jane knows who the murderer is…I know he does." Van Pelt glanced up at the dark haired agent.

"What if you're wrong?" Van Pelt quietly asked. "What if you rush in and he's already dead?"

"He won't be."

"What if he is?"

"We won't allow that." Lisbon answered, interrupting the other three from adding more to the conversation. "Jane is going to come back alive, do you hear me?"

"We don't even know if he was kidnapped or if he left willingly." Rigsby stated.

"He's got a point, boss." Cho agreed, Lisbon scoffed silently and decided (a bit foolishly) that if they weren't going to help her, she was going to go rescue him herself.

It wasn't until she had turned back toward her office, a plan already forming in her mind; the phone began to ring again.

"Lisbon."

_"Teresa?"_

"Rhys?"

_"Yes."_ He responded. _"It's Rhys."_

Lisbon glanced back at her team, as Van Pelt began to search for the location once more.

"Are you alright?"

_"I'm fine, listen to me…"_ Lisbon felt a strange feeling of déjà vu come back over her as Rhys continued. _"Whatever you do, don't…"_ Lisbon heard some yelling on the other end, and a tight controlled sobbing._"Don't…"_a loud echo of flesh hitting flesh, flashed into the phone and into her ears.

"Rhys?"

_"Don't…"_ he muttered. _"No matter what you do, don't save me." _Lisbon glanced at her team, who seemed to stare at her in confusion. _"No…leave me alone!" _The heart-wrenching sob tore through the phone and Lisbon tore the phone away from her ear, her stomach churning as she continued to hear his voice sob from the phone every second or so. "_I'm going to die…"_

"Rhys..." Lisbon urged, and the phone went dead.

"I've got it." Van Pelt repeated, after three minutes or so. "He's in Sunnyvale…"

"We'll have to split up then." Lisbon directed. "I'll go to Anaheim, Rigsby, Cho go to Sunnyvale, Van Pelt stay here."

"We're not about to let you go alone." Van Pelt argued.

"I can handle myself." Lisbon snapped. "I'm telling Hightower we have a lead, and we'll go from there." Lisbon ignored the concerned glances as she hurried to Hightower's office.


	16. Harder to Breathe

**Red Silences**

Thanks to **lucy**, **Jisbon4ever**, **lisbon69**, and **Frogster **for the amazing reviews—and as always, a thanks also goes to the readers and alerters.

Out of all the chapters I've written for this story, this one is probably my favorite! (I just thought I'd share that with you.)

* * *

**Chapter Sixteen: **

**Harder to Breathe**

Lisbon held a grip of death on the steering wheel as she neared her destination, it hadn't exactly been hard to persuade Hightower to let Lisbon and her unit go off to find both Jane and Rhys to bring them in for questioning, but Lisbon had let one little detail go missing; the very fact that she was alone would have gotten heat from the bureau but she had to do this herself, she had to make sure Jane was safe.  
Van Pelt had sent her the actual pinpointed address of the large, abandoned warehouse to which she was only about two minutes away from.

She felt her heart thump against her ribs, as she exited onto the almost ghost-like roadway to take her straight to the warehouse; she had the radio on, which softly hummed into her vehicle. About a mile or so down the abandoned stretch of roadway, she turned into the parking lot of the shabbiest warehouses she had ever seen and turned her car off, before she pocketed the keys and lifted her gun from its holster. Lisbon opened her car door and jumped from the car, her cell phone still in her pocket as she moved toward the wide chipped paint doors with the gun still in her hands, aimed and ready to shoot if needed.  
When suddenly, her phone went off in her pocket and she hurriedly made a grab for it to find out that Rigsby was on the line.

"Did you…?"

_"He's not here, Boss."_ Rigsby's voice came across the phone as Lisbon paused to listen to his words. _"We checked the whole warehouse, no sign of anyone."_

"Are you sure?" She asked, disbelief tinting her voice.

_"I'm positive."_ She stepped backwards, and began to turn when she heard his voice.

"I'm so glad to have you back with us, Agent Lisbon." The voice was soft, deep and dark which had Lisbon turning around to find a man with shoulder length blonde hair and cold steel blue eyes standing behind her, dressed in a pristine black silk suit with a blood red tie as the both stood outside the warehouse, Lisbon's gun aimed at him. "Aren't we boys?" Lisbon felt hands on both her upper arms as the phone was yanked from hand and discarded on the ground.

"Yes." Lisbon shifted her glance to both sides to find Jane and Rhys holding onto her, both of them staring straight ahead at the blonde haired man who smirked coldly. Lisbon struggled against the ironclad grasp both men held on her arms.

"Let me go!" She struggled to throw her elbow back, but the grasp prevented her from moving her elbow any more than an inch.

"But, Teresa?" The man questioned, mockingly. "Where's the fun in that?" She forced herself to stay still for a moment or so, until she managed to fit her finger around the trigger and try to discreetly tip her gun down toward Jane's foot however before she could pull the trigger, the gun was pulled from her fingers by the blonde haired man who carelessly tossed the gun back and forth in his hands until he pointed it toward Lisbon. "Do you know how easy and fun it would be to kill you here, beautiful?" Lisbon struggled once more in the strong hold, to no avail. "I would hate to see your beautiful and precious life adorn this blacktop under our feet, after all…what good would you be to me dead?" Lisbon refused to respond, as she silently cursed herself—she should have known this was going to be a trap, she should have known from the way Jane and Rhys had acted over the phone and now, here she was in the capture of this maniac without help to escape. "Bring her with us boys." He ordered, as both holstered her off the ground to where her feet couldn't touch the ground. "She's going to be useful to get what I want."

"What do you want?" Lisbon spat in his direction, to which he just laughed in response.

"Agent Lisbon," the man began. "Like I would tell you, when you'll find out soon enough."

The blonde haired man turned to his silent cohorts, who stood with their hands still on Lisbon.

"Take the lighter fluid from the back," he demanded. "Pick her phone up from the ground, pitch it in the car and set the whole thing ablaze." The two nodded, and moved in perfect rhythm with Lisbon to retrieve the fluid from the back of the vehicle.

Twenty minutes later, the car would be up in flames and the black limo would already be speeding away to its next location.

**OoO**

Rigsby glanced at his phone in surprise, while Cho drove them both back to HQ.

"What's wrong?" Cho asked, his eyes glancing over toward the dark haired agent.

"Lisbon suddenly grew silent."

"You think something's going on?" Rigsby didn't even need to respond to have Cho nod, and take the next turn off the road so both could easily get to Anaheim. Rigsby also made a call to Van Pelt to ask her for the address of the warehouse.

_"Is Lisbon alright?"_ Van Pelt asked.

"That's what we're checking on now." Rigsby explained. "She just suddenly grew silent, can you give us the address." Van Pelt gave the address before she added in a low voice.

_"Hightower is on a rampage, make sure you bring Lisbon home…alive?"_

"Will do, thanks Van Pelt." Rigsby hung up the phone and glanced at Cho. "Hightower's on a rampage."

"Do you know why?" Rigsby shook his head, before he gave the directions to Lisbon's believed location.

Rigsby and Cho saw the billows of smoke from the directions of the warehouse as a limo sped past them, and mindless of any police on the abandoned stretch of road—they hurried along to find Lisbon's car ablaze, and no one else around.

He undid his seat belt, opened the door and jumped from the still-running vehicle, not caring if he ended up hurt or burnt; he ran toward the burning vehicle to see if Lisbon was inside or not.


	17. Twenty Four

**Red Silences**

Thanks to **Frogster**, **jisbon4ever**, **lucy **and **lisbon69 **for the reviews—and of course, thank you to all the readers and alerters.

**Warnings: **Language and _minor _torture.

* * *

**Chapter Seventeen:**

**Twenty-Four **

Hightower furiously glanced at the unit in front of her, her brown eyes narrowed slightly as she took in each one of them while they gathered in her office, Van Pelt attending to Rigsby's fresh burns.

"How irresponsible can you all be?" Hightower hissed. "I thought you all knew better than to send anyone out there alone, especially not Lisbon..."

"We warned her about that and she…" Rigsby began, which had an irate Hightower pounding her fist on her desk.

"I don't care if you had attached a damn sign to her back!" Hightower screeched. "On behalf of your stupid actions, they've probably cost us our best agent."

"All of this could have been avoided, if you had refused to let Jane resign." Van Pelt argued back, as Hightower grew angrier. "With all due respect ma'am, if Jane was kidnapped it was because you let him resign from protection." Hightower sat straighter in her chair, and glared down the redheaded agent who had taken the brunt of everything so far from the special agent.

"Agent Van Pelt, I should suspend you." Hightower threatened, before she surveyed Rigsby and Cho. "In fact, I should suspend you all, but because Lisbon is gone…"

"What does Lisbon's disappearance have with us being suspended?" Cho rounded. "If you wanted to suspend us, you could and you could have another unit take a look at her disappearance." Hightower remained silent for a few moments, and she tilted her head to glance down at her paperwork.

"You're right." Hightower agreed, with a sigh. "I need your unit to track her down, dare I admit it—you all are the best unit I have in this place, and if anyone can find Lisbon, it's you all." The compliment was enough to smooth over the relationship between the Serious Crimes Unit and Special Agent Hightower, for now. "Do you all have any updates?"

"No." Rigsby admitted, flinching in pain. "The road was pretty much abandoned, and the old warehouse wouldn't have had any cameras."

"What about the main traffic cams?" Hightower asked.

"We checked those, the only thing that sped out of the parking lot was a black limo."

"Maybe you'll get lucky if you check the DMV database to see who all owns a black limo." Hightower offered, and her phone rang but before she answered it, she glanced at the unit. "Keep me updated, you're all dismissed." The group nodded, and left Hightower attending to her business except for Van Pelt, who waved the two ahead.

Hightower eventually placed down her phone on the desk and glanced at the redheaded agent.

"Yes?"

"I'll wait until you're off the phone." Hightower nodded, and handled the phone once more as Van Pelt settled down in the chair in front of Hightower's personal desk. Hightower finished and placed her phone back on the receiver, only to glance at Van Pelt.

"What did you need, Agent?"

"I need to know what Jane said to you."

"I'm afraid I can't tell you that, Agent." Hightower explained. "Without probable cause."

"The probable cause is... I believe that Jane had something to do with this." Hightower's jaw dropped slightly. "You saw the footage from Alyson's security feed."

"I did." Hightower agreed, solemnly.

**OoO**

Lisbon awoke to blinding lights, no clothing on at all, as she remained stretched out across the king-sized bed, each strap attached to a different extremity while her face remained pressed into the soft pillow; she tried to wiggle her legs when suddenly, a sharp pain cut across her bare buttock which caused her to buck away from the pain.

"Now, now Teresa." It was the same man from earlier. "You need to be taught a lesson; I promise this will be over soon." Lisbon struggled against her restraints again, which resulted in a blow to the upper back that had her crying out in pain, with her eyes sealed shut. "You're doing such a good job, pretty girl." Lisbon wondered if the man had some issue with people, considering that one moment he was a controlling son-of-a-bitch and the next moment, he was that soothing old man that everyone knew, another sting of pain cracked down on her right leg, which had her bucking again. "How are you supposed to learn if you keep moving your fucking body?" Another sting on her other leg, which left her screaming in pain until the man laughed. "It's almost done, child." Lisbon heard him walk away, and nearly vomited from the pain and the mess she knew she'd face later on. "This is going to hurt, baby." Instead of the stinging pain, she felt a searing hot pain scorch her upper right shoulder blade, the searing pain caused her stomach to rebel and without a second thought, she lost control of her stomach before she lost control of her consciousness only moments after.

The man with the blonde hair leaned over and pressed his lips to Lisbon's forehead before he turned toward the two men waiting for him. "Tell the bitch that I need her in my chambers, right away." Both nodded, and left the room together as the man turned back toward Lisbon. "You will become to like this place, and I'll treat you like the queen." The man allowed a dark smile to cross his face. "You'll be my wife, and we can punish those who need to be taught a lesson-you see, before you were brought here, you were dirty because you loved all those men but now, all the people you love are here and you can become just like them." The man caressed her slightly damp cheek with his soft hand. "I love you, and in time…you'll come to love me too, or I'll make you love me, just like I made your _friends_ obey me."


	18. Innocence

**Red Silences**

Thanks to **Frogster**, **Jisbon4ever**, and **lucy** for the reviews, and as always, the alerters and readers to this story.

**Warnings**: Language, Sexual Assault and, per Frogster's request…hahaha, a cliffhanger. :P

* * *

**Chapter Eighteen:**

**Innocence**

He awaited impatiently in his own decorated bedroom chamber, the expensive suit crinkled on his impeccable form from his scuffle with his queen from earlier; Avery Duane had wanted everything just right for his soon-to-be queen, and if that meant getting what he wanted out of that bitch Alyson, then he'd take what he wanted.  
The solid oak doors opened, revealing the three who had given him his queen. Patrick and Rhys, their faces blank and passive as they brought up the rear beyond Alyson, who wore no expression either and he sighed in happiness. Sometimes, all it took to get what you wanted was some good old fashion mind games and three people who were broken beyond repair.

He chuckled as Alyson moved forward, her brunette hair matted with dry blood, sweat, her clothes dingy and disgusting from the days of not being able to take showers and once she stood in front of him, she lowered herself to get on her knees.

"Go ahead." He commanded.

She didn't have to be told twice to go ahead, and Avery allowed himself to fall into the small comforts of taking things he couldn't yet have freely; eventually, they would all love him and would want to give this to him for free without the order to do so, until then however, he would continue to allow them to dream and keep them under while he himself, kept dreaming of a happier tomorrow where all of them could be together.

**OoO**

Lisbon opened her eyes to find herself in the same spot as earlier, sore as hell-her shoulder blade, she knew was on fire considering that she had accidentally shifted it upon waking up.  
She wondered how long it would take anyone to come after her and rescue her, as the man who held her captive was practically insane. She shifted her head, mindful of her shoulder blade and managed to rest her eyes for a few moments before she heard loud, eardrum shattering screams.

What the hell was going on?  
Was he doing something to someone else?

Lisbon struggled against her restraints, until she howled in pain which she silenced by chomping down on her lip, blood pouring from her lip and dribbling down her pale chin. Lisbon spat, the blood and all coursing from her mouth, which caused her some relief and some joy, considering that she had probably soiled the man's bed sheets.

"Morning, my beauty." The man was back. "We're going to get you cleaned up, and looking pretty today." She felt the restraints fall from her legs, and arms as she fell onto her own disgusting liquids from her own mess of a body-she felt arms lift her, and because she was too weak to fight, she allowed the person to carry her to where ever they had to go. "…and if everything goes as plan, we'll get married tomorrow…" Lisbon's eyes widened, and he smiled. "You'll become Mrs. Avery Duane, and everything will be yours." He moved his lips to kiss her brow, to which she dodged his lips and he scowled. "We're getting married; you need to learn to kiss me Teresa."

"No…" she managed, hoarsely and he grimaced.

"If you don't, I will make you."

"No."

"I don't think you realize what I'm capable of, dear." Avery told her, as the both of them ended up in the large bathroom together, where a porcelain white toilet remained along with a large white curtained shower and white sink. "I'm going to need to give you a shower, and you're going to accept it." Lisbon felt tears prick her eyes, and he smiled lightly. "You're going to need to get used to this, or I'll make you do everything automatically—much like I make your _friends_ do it and I doubt you'd like that." Lisbon refused to answer and Avery shifted his hand to move back the shower curtain, which revealed a black marble wall and attached to the wall happened to be another pair of restraints for arms and legs.

He lifted himself over the shower ledge, and restrained her with the leather straps before getting out and slowly pulling off his own clothes-Lisbon could only watch in complete horror as the man before her stripped completely and came to rest in the shower with her, his naked body pressing against hers.

"It'll be okay, love." Lisbon shuddered. "You're going to love living here," and without another word, he turned the shower on, pulled the curtain closed to where the water molded against them as he pressed his rough lips to hers, his body pressing against hers still.

_What did I do to deserve this?_

He continued on, as the water drenched them both and after a while, the tears and the water all felt the same to her.

Heavy, and worthless

**OoO**

The pink towel curled around her shivering body, as he left her sitting on the toilet seat-she tried to focus on everything in the room besides the shower, but her mind kept replaying every little detail in slow motion-haunting her, as she could still feel his rough hands across her bottom and his lips pressed against hers in a crushing matter.  
If she had the strength, she would have bolted from the room but for her all but the strength to keep her eyes open had faded from her body, leaving her as helpless as an infant and slightly frightened especially as the bathroom door opened to reveal her "husband-to-be," Avery who held a garment bag in his hands.

"I hope this makes you feel like a queen," he muttered to her and hung the large bag on the inside of the bathroom door as he moved to unzip the blue bag to reveal a dark green silk number instead, he moved back to Lisbon to lift her again to place her in the dress, which once on only reached mid-thigh and revealed a great portion of cleavage. "Does this make you feel like a queen." She didn't respond, to which he responded by backhanding her across the face. "When I ask you a question, you will answer me." She stared up him, her mouth slightly open. "Do you feel like a queen?" She nodded. "Words, Teresa."

"I feel like a queen." She responded, and he grinned.

"Good, let's do something about that awful hair…shall we?"

"Yes." She responded, quietly and he chuckled.

"See, isn't this easier than fighting with me?"

"Yes." She repeated and he cradled her in his arms, as she clenched her eyes shut to avoid having to stare at the closed bathroom door.


	19. Paradise

**Red Silences**

Thanks to **Anna**, **Frogster**, **Frozen Bacon **and **Jisbon4ever **for the reviews, and thank you to all the readers and alerters as well.

I just have one word for you all: cliffhanger.

Enjoy the chapter!

* * *

**Chapter Nineteen:**

**Paradise **

She could only watch in mild-horror as this man, who claimed to be her fiancée snipped away at her dark hair—the dark and wet locks, ghosting down her bare shoulder and onto the hardwood floor below the both of them, as Lisbon had been placed on the pure white vanity bench in what she assumed was the man's bedroom; Avery kept boasting about how much more beautiful she would look after he finished with her, after he fixed her up to be the perfect little wife.  
Lisbon wondered what he would say or even do to her if she said she wasn't about to become the perfect little housewife for him, but his temper (as he had already proven to her) was a quick fire to set off, and the last thing she wanted was anymore injury.

"I'm almost done." He cooed to her, as he ghosted his own fingers over her pale clenched jaw. "You can look now." Lisbon brought her green eyes to the mirror, to find a stranger's face staring back at her—lightly bruised, with shadowed green eyes staring back while the once shoulder length hair which had been completely altered rested against her upper jaw. "Do you like it?" Lisbon remained quiet. "I will repeat again, do you like it?"

"No." Lisbon responded, to which he grabbed both her shoulders tightly and squeezed to cause her unbearable pain.

"Do you like it?" He repeated through clenched teeth, which had her slightly shaking.

"Yes…" she hissed, and he softly smiled as he let her still inflamed shoulders go.

"Here," he allowed his lips to drop to her shoulder blades, rough lips and teeth trailed over the inflamed skin, which caused her to shutter in response. "Does that make you feel better, baby?"

"Yes…" She lied, trying to keep herself from stammering.

"Good," he said with a small smile. "I'm always going to be here to make you feel better." Lisbon reframed herself from replying to him, even as he snaked his arms around her waist and held her against his abdomen in a smug grasp.

Exhaustion won the battle over fear, and it took her under-her head on his abdomen, eyes closed as he stroked her soft hair beneath his rough fingers.

"Soon, my love, soon." Avery muttered, under his breath. "I need you to see that I'm doing this for the best, and…" he paused, a slow, sinister smile spreading across his lips. "I know just the way to make myself look less like the monster you think I am in your eyes."

**OoO**

"…this is my fault." Hightower admitted to the Serious Crimes Unit, who had just returned from following a possible lead on both the young woman's case and Lisbon's disappearance which seemed pretty well connected. Van Pelt eyed the special agent, who remained standing near Lisbon's office, in a dark blazer and patterned skirt with a slight frown printed across her face. "I should never have allowed Jane to resign."

"No, you shouldn't have." Cho agreed, at which Hightower glanced down at the floor before glancing back at the unit.

"It doesn't matter who's at fault here." Hightower gave, gravely. "We need to save Lisbon."

"Jane wouldn't hurt her." Rigsby threw out from his own desk. "His ideas involving Red John aren't always the sanest, but I know above all things that he would never hurt her." Hightower shrugged.

"Rigsby, as much as I honor your loyalty toward Jane—we can't take any chances." Hightower explained, with a sigh. "Red John's kidnapping him made him an almost completely different person, and do not tell me that you all did not notice." No one responded, shifting in his or her seats. "We need an APB out on Patrick Jane." Rigsby shot out of his chair, blue eyes narrowed and focused on the serious Hightower.

"No, I refuse." Hightower sighed, again.

"Agent Rigsby, do not make me arrest you on the account of hindering an investigation." Rigsby hesitated, and Cho stood from his own seat to stare at Hightower.

"He couldn't hurt her." Cho agreed, which had Hightower, Rigsby and Van Pelt staring at him in three completely different emotions; anger, relief and agreement. "He was in love with her." The three grew silent until Hightower snorted.

"He loved her?" Hightower had her eyebrow knitted in irritation. "Do you know how many murderers kill their wives because they love them?"

"Not as many as the ones that kill their wives because they don't love them." Cho deadpanned which received a chuckle disguised as a cough from Rigsby and a hidden grin from Van Pelt. "Jane was in love with Lisbon, whether he knew it or not."

"Love will not stand up in a court of law, especially when one is sitting on two charges of kidnapping and a probable cause of three first degree murders."

"Jane didn't do them." Rigsby restated.

"I still have to send an APB out on him." Hightower explained, and no one moved. "Send it or I'll arrest all of you for hindering this investigation."

"You're wasting your time." Van Pelt threw out. "If Jane was behind this, do you not think that Lisbon wouldn't have hesitated to find him, haul him in and arrest him?"

"I wouldn't know, after all Lisbon is just as much of a flight risk at the moment as he is." Hightower threw out to the surprise of the three agents. "Lisbon has probably joined Jane on his killing spree."

"The last time I checked," Cho threw out in the angry silence. "A killing spree consisted of killing more people than just three."

"You three put so much blind faith in that woman, as with Jane." Hightower chided, softly. "But what happens if this time around, she's behind this and you're defending a guilty woman?" The three grew silent. "I want an APB on Patrick Jane and Teresa Lisbon." Hightower remained standing by the office door, even as Rigsby dialed in the order given from Hightower.


	20. Lacrymosa

**Red Silences**

Thanks to **Jisbon4ever**, **Frozen Bacon**, **Frogster **and **lucy **for the reviews, and I also thank all the readers and alerters for this story!

**Warnings**: Sexual assault and another cliffhanger.

**Chapter Twenty:**

**Lacrymosa**

The full brunt of weight atop her chest sent her spiraling from the comfortable and familiar whirlwind world of darkness, to a world of horrors as her green eyes shot open in unadulterated panic while her lungs begged for air, every attempt at taking in air thwarted by the feeling as if sharp knives pierced through her.

"Isn't this what you wanted, Teresa?" Lisbon's fearful eyes focused on the blonde hair and blue-green eyes as they into hers from above. "Didn't you want me to love you?" She tried to relax her deafening heartbeat pounding against her chest by closing her eyes, squeezing them completely shut.

She felt his hot breath on her neck as he raised himself from her chest to allow her to take a large deep breath only to feel a sharp sensation of teeth nip at her shoulder, which had her screaming out in pain, her body rocking in spasms against the cool comforter as Jane's clothed thighs kept her to the bed. "Didn't you want me to want you, Teresa?" He breathed, hot and heavy into her ear before he had his mouth on her earlobe, sucking and licking which elicited her eyes to open once more and a loud half-moan from pleasure and a loud scream from fear spilled from her lips; she struggled to escape from the man who was seemed to be inches away from undoing his pants, and who was probably minutes away from ripping the dress off her own body.  
Lisbon allowed a strangled sob to filter through her lips, and she felt fingers ghost her dampened cheeks.

"What do you want me to say?" Lisbon breathed, softly while she tried to hide the panic from her voice. "What do you want me to do?" Jane allowed a dark cat-like grin to dance across his face as he glanced down at the dark haired agent.

"I want you to tell me," Jane breathed, stroking her cheeks with his fingertips. "That you love me."

"I love you." She whispered, trembling and fighting the urge to vomit as his lips crashed down upon her own.

**OoO**

_The sand was scorching hot beneath his own bare feet, the summer sun beating down upon his bare chest, tanned from the endless days of surfing; he felt the urge to lay down in the shade, chest first as he jogged along the shore and as he lowered himself down on top of the sand, it trembled slightly, he pressed his lips to the sand which burnt him and his teeth scraped across the warm sand also, the sky jolted with thunder and lighting, to which he merely glanced toward the sky to find it the same relaxing shade of blue he was used to._

__

For the past two weeks, life had gone from solving crimes with the pretty, petite dark haired woman (he couldn't remember her name) to being able to surf in the Californian swell all day and sleep under the expansive stretch of stars at night.  
Sometimes, he could barely remember his name but once somewhere, he had been married and had a daughter, as for what happened to them and why they weren't there, he hadn't a clue.

The sun upon his back went from comfortably warm to blistering hot, pain exploding from his calves, his shoulders and even his behind; he glanced back up at the sky in curiosity to find that the sky was no longer blue; instead, it was a steel grey as a few drops of rain fell from the sky.

But, it wasn't rain—  
It was acid.

_He felt the liquid eat through him, he felt as if he were literally being burned alive within his own skin; and he tried to scream but his words would no longer come because they never came anymore. _

**OoO**

Hot tears coursed down her pale cheeks, as the man before her prepared himself for the second round, a smirk across his lips as his fingers ghosted across her bare and swollen breasts, when suddenly, the bedroom door opened to reveal Avery.

"Wake…" Avery paused, his eyes taking in the scene before him. "What the hell are you doing?" Jane fell from atop of Lisbon and onto the floor as Avery hurriedly made his way over to the frightened Lisbon, who immediately latched onto him as a small child would latch onto his or her parent and sobbed into his shoulder.

"Sssh," he whispered. "Everything is going to be alright." She only continued to hang onto him for dear life, tattered green dress straps, from where he had torn her dress off her were the only things separating her from Avery. "Do you want me to do something, baby?" Lisbon furiously nodded, a sob still rolling from her lips as Avery nodded and turned to the kneeling Jane. "Patrick?" Lisbon peered at him, but had to bury her head into Avery's shoulder because she couldn't bring herself to stare at him. "Teresa, I'm going to sit you on the bench…okay?" Lisbon's eyes glanced up at him, full of terror and he whispered back, "I'll be right here, I promise." She slowly nodded in agreement, and he sat her down on the vanity bench before he turned back to Jane, and lifted a leg to kick him in the abdomen before pulling a slender leather object from his tuxedo pocket.

Avery proceeded to uncoil the object before letting it encounter Jane's bare abdomen, shoulders, rear end and legs for almost an hour straight as Lisbon stared on at Avery in admiration; he had saved her, and he hadn't hurt her as he had.  
The scene in the shower meant nothing, Lisbon decided, still shaking with her arms around her bare body, compared to this as Avery had only wanted to clean her up—he hadn't wanted to hurt her, and he most certainty hadn't wanted to force anything out of her like he had done; Avery turned back to her once Jane was a bleeding mess, and she launched herself back into his arms as he promised nothing would ever hurt her again.

Avery however, with his head over her shoulder as she continued to sob smirked—it had worked, and Jane, Avery noted with prideful satisfaction would probably never be able to walk again or even have Lisbon to himself, in any form of a relationship after that.

**I write too much angst, and too many cliffhangers to be considered a decent person :) **


	21. Take Me Away

**Red Silences**

Thanks to **Jisbon4ever**, **lucy**, **Anna**, **allanon9**, **BelleLee**, **Frogster **and **Frozen Bacon** for the reviews, and thanks to the alerters and readers as well.

I think this qualifies as another cliffhanger? :)

* * *

**Chapter Twenty-One**

**Take Me Away**

"It's sad isn't it?" Avery mocked the dying man before him on the floor, who was bleeding from his fresh wounds. "It takes being under a deep hypnosis to finally get what you want, but then again—I suppose that it was the same for your fellow coworkers." Jane's chest rose and fell in a ragged pattern. "How does it feel now that you've got it, and the price of death to follow?" Avery chuckled, as he slid onto the ruined bed to stare down at the broken man. "You see, tomorrow night she'll be my wife like she should have been in the very beginning…" Avery reflected on the thought, with a slight smirk. He had been watching Teresa for twenty straight months, waiting for the perfect moment to strike up a conversation with her but…something or rather someone had always interrupted his perfect idea.

Patrick Jane had been a constant thorn in Avery Duane's side from day one—the man had always been closer to Teresa, always able to make the move to ask her out but he never did and Avery wondered why.  
Sure, Patrick Jane had lost his wife and daughter to a serial killer but that didn't mean that he couldn't still grieve and date, he obviously had dated that psychic woman but he wouldn't even cast his eyes toward the most beautiful woman in the world.

For that reason alone, Avery was annoyed.

It was then, shortly after the whole incident at the CBI with the older man and his team being murdered that Avery had decided to learn hypnotism; he had learned it and mastered it within a number of months, and then he went through the process of transforming his life from the worthless man he had been to the powerful man he was now. He had managed to use his hypnotism skills indirectly, and had managed to swindle money from rich women who had no idea what exactly he was doing, as they fell directly into his hands and into his bidding. From there, it had been self-explanatory.  
He had bought his huge mansion, changed his name and had placed his plan into action to seduce Teresa into falling in love with him.

That plan however, had fallen through the very moment Jane had been kidnapped and met the serial killer who had killed his wife and child—Jane needed Teresa, and he understood that but slowly, the two began to spend more time around each other and it burned him up; he had allowed Teresa to comfort him and this was how they paid him back? Playing hot and cold using sexual arousal and the gifts of caring? It made him beyond sick, so the night of Jane's attempted suicide…Avery had managed to sneak into Jane's apartment while he was _cutting_ himself and someone had knocked on the door while Jane had turned to clean up after himself only to find Avery Duane.

Avery panicked, and stabbed him before he hid in the shower only to hear Lisbon's voice, and after Jane had managed to leave the hospital, the reason for him not telling Lisbon about the stranger in his apartment had been the cunning plan of replacing Jane's anti-depressant with just enough medication to make him forget, and to make him think that he had tried to commit suicide due to his encounter with Red John.

Jane, in theory had quit the CBI due to his repressed feelings for Lisbon but it also had to do with the paranoia from the medicine and after Jane had quit, Avery waltzed right in and had picked the man up from one of the classier bars.

"You look like you're having a rough day," Avery had said, as he sat down next to Jane who was staring deeply into his own drink. Jane didn't respond for a moment or two, and had turned his head for a millisecond to check something when Avery's hand had fallen on Jane's shoulder to cause some panic but before Jane could panic, Avery had him right where he needed to be and the soothing words that Jane had tried on Rigsby, and had tried on Lisbon had an even deeper effect on Jane.  
Avery, at that time hadn't realized that the medicine that had been the reason for the medical hallucinations and the hypnotism together, had robbed Jane of any type of will to do right or wrong, instead it left him an empty shell of nothing to work with and reprogram.

Rhys and Alyson, on the other hand had been the perfect scapegoats—Rhys had been Lisbon's boyfriend which gave him motive to murder Jane, especially if he knew that Jane was trying to move in on his girlfriend and as for Alyson, Avery had needed someone to practice his seduction skills on as he also needed someone to become both the flower girl and the bridesmaid at the wedding between himself and Teresa. It also didn't help that Avery had noticed that Rhys and Alyson held the same dynamics of a relationship that his Teresa and Jane had—the play on sexual arousal and the gifts of caring.

Alyson, who should never amount to anything but a whore in his opinion, continued to throw herself at the ignorant Rhys, who continued to throw her aside in favor of the other women he continued to court.  
"I wanted you at the wedding too…" Avery chuckled, slightly disappointed. "You could have led the woman you loved down the isle to wed another man." Jane twitched slightly, before his eyes closed and Avery called Rhys into the room. "Take him down; fix him up as much as you can." Rhys nodded, and grabbed the older man to drag him to the hole the three remained in, in the basement of the four floored mansion; the last thing he was going to do was allow Jane to die before seeing the woman of his dreams marry another man willingly and after tonight, Lisbon would probably never be able to sit in the same room as Jane again.

Avery shrugged, staring down at the scarlet stained carpet—he'd allow Jane to speak with Lisbon as himself tomorrow before the wedding, after all what harm could it do besides reaffirm her even more into why she was marrying him in the first place.


	22. Here is Gone

**Red Silences**

Thanks to **Frozen Bacon**, **lucy**, **lisbon69** and **Frogster **for the amazing reviews, and as always—thanks to the readers and alerters.

I'll just add kindly, it's another cliffhanger.

* * *

**Chapter Twenty-Two**

**Here is Gone**

Rigsby held his arms crossed against his chest, as he stared down at his vacant desk—both Van Pelt and Cho hadn't spoken to him since he had placed the APB yesterday at Hightower's direction, however what the both of them didn't realize was the only reason that Rigsby had placed the bulletin out in the first place was because he had a feeling that no amount of secondary leads were going to lead them to Lisbon or Jane before Hightower could get ahold of either one and arrest them for something they didn't do.

Rigsby moved his eyes on the phone, before glancing at his co-workers who were doing their best to ignore him—he stood and indirectly motioned them to follow him to the kitchenette, which they did.

"Listen," Rigsby began. "I did what I had to do…"

"…to get to the both of them before Hightower could." Cho interrupted. "We know." Rigsby glanced at the both of them.

"What if I told you, I have something?"

"Then I'd want to hear it, Agent Rigsby." Hightower popped into the kitchenette and Rigsby grimaced lightly, it seemed like that woman was constantly hanging around to degrade their work.

"Someone called saying that they saw a black limo speeding from the road where the warehouse was located." Rigsby offered, and Hightower shook her head.

"Information like this isn't exactly important, as we already knew they were driving a limo." Hightower scoffed and left the three alone and Cho glanced at him.

"We saw that limo on the way into the warehouse."

"I know," Rigsby, told him. "I'll explain on the way, it's a long drive."

"How long of a drive?"

"Six hours."

"Who's driving?"

"I am." Van Pelt interceded. "Come on."

The three didn't hesitate to head back toward the bullpen, mindful of the fact that Hightower could be lingering anywhere and what they were doing could cost them their careers and their personal freedom.

**OoO**

Lisbon hadn't seen Avery, except for when she had first awoken to find him against her backside holding her to him but his claim for avoiding her all day had been that it was bad luck for a groom to see his bride before the wedding; the very thought however had her stomach twisting in knots as she realized that she was getting married in a few hours to a man who had not only kidnapped her, but had saved her from…

She shook her head and distanced herself from those thoughts while she wondered if she would ever escape, her stomach twisted again, and she felt herself shiver.

"I'm supposed to help you get ready," Alyson's voice stirred her from her thoughts again, and Lisbon stared at the expressionless woman whose arms were flattened against her side. "Come on, we have much to do and so little time to do it." Lisbon nodded, and followed the woman from the brightly lit dark-themed kitchen to start the beginning of the rest of her new and forced life with Avery Duane as Mrs. Teresa Duane.

Alyson led her to a small room without windows, nowhere near the master bedroom and opened the door for her—Lisbon stepped inside glanced around to find a small bed which held a light blue dress bag on the bed, with a pair of black high heels lying on the dark carpeted floor, she turned around to find Alyson closing the door behind her as she neared the bride-to-be with almost quiet precision.

For the next three hours, Lisbon would be prodded, poked and forced into a strapless emerald green wedding gown with strapless black six inch heels, and the both of them had just sat down on the dark wooden vanity bench to begin the work on Lisbon's hair when the sound of someone knocking on the door interrupted the beginning stages of the curling. Alyson set the scolding curling iron down on the wooden vanity to head toward the door and answer it.  
However, as Lisbon had originally thought, it wasn't Avery or Rhys who stood beyond the door.

Instead, it was Jane, who was gripping onto the doorframe for dear life as he viewed Lisbon in complete surprise; she glanced back at him in complete fear and fell from the vanity bench, eyes wide as she threw herself against the white wall, her body shaking and shivering as she tried to escape from Jane's focus.

"I'll be back." Alyson told Lisbon, as Jane stumbled into the room, his hands grasping onto the wall in support until he was able to collapse on the bed—his whole body shaking and face dampened with the slight sheen of sweat while Alyson left, closing and locking the door behind her to leave the both alone.

"Lisbon?"

Her mouth suddenly became dry, her world spinning and sliding before her very own eyes as Jane's figure became blurred, her heart beat increasing behind her chest and she tried to breathe, but something held her lungs, squeezing until dark spots swam before her vision and the sting of vomit rushed forth from her lips to hit the dark carpeted floor, completely missing her gown.

"Are you alright?" He rasped, as Lisbon wiped the remains of vomit from her lips, her hands shaking slightly, while she kept her wide eyes on his unmoving form as impossible as that task may have seemed to her blurring vision.

"Stay the hell away from me, you sick bastard!"

Rage poured through her veins as his hand moved to touch her; she pulled herself up from the floor and leapt over to grab the curling iron from the vanity table. She moved to stand over him, as he stared at her with wide eyes while she ripped his soiled shirt away from his stomach and brought the curling iron down on his abdomen.

He screamed in pain, and Lisbon watched in satisfaction with a dark smirk across her lips as the slightly red skin of Jane's boiled beneath the curling iron, care of her own doing…He was never going to touch anyone ever again, not if she had something to do about it.


	23. Rhiannon

**Red Silences**

Thanks to **lucy**, **Vermontgirl61**, **Frozen Bacon**, **Anna**, **Frogster **and **Jisbon4ever **for the reviews! I'm not going to keep anyone from another chapter :) considering you'll have to wait till tomorrow for the next chapter….yes, this chapter may or may not include a cliffhanger.

**Chapter Twenty-Three**

**Rhiannon **

Avery stood in the mirror, adjusting the emerald tie on his person as he allotted a simple smile toward the perfect reflection of shoulder length blonde hair and steel blue eyes—the tuxedo, as always fit perfectly on him as he made a few small turns to check himself over. He, after all, had wanted to look as best as humanly possible on his wedding day and for his gorgeous bride, who was sure to stun all the guests in attendance as she stepped down the isle.

"He's there." Alyson stated, and Avery turned to face the brown-haired woman who stood morosely near his bedroom oak door with her arms hanging loosely down to her sides.

"Good." Avery commanded with his eyes focused on her before he turned again to stare at himself in the mirror, he watched his chest expand for a few seconds before a blood-curling scream slashed through the silence, and Avery chuckled. "What exactly did you leave them with?"

"I left them with a curling iron."

Avery closed his eyes, a wide smirk flashing across his face as he imagined Jane squirming under the heat of the curling iron held by Teresa, screaming out in pain.  
"Excellent." He murmured softly, he could not have asked for a better wedding present, even if he had tried, than this one.

**OoO**

What had she done?

The curling iron hit the carpeted ground with a soft thud, as Jane's blistered and burnt chest shuttered with fragmented breaths, his eyes closed and almost every inch of his legs, arms, face, abdomen, chest and hands had turned from the pale skin to an angry, blistering red from the pressure and heat of the curling iron against his skin.

Lisbon fell to her knees, emerald gown pooling around her knees and sobbed into her hands; what had she just done?

"I'm sorry," she whimpered, softly. "I'm so sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry…"

Avery held his arms crossed against his chest, as he leaned against the doorframe and watched his wife-to-be sob into her hands on her knees. It was then; Avery realized with a grimace as he watched her shoulders move up and down, that no matter how many precautions he had taken to have Teresa to marry him she would never love him, as her heart belonged to another male, who currently was unconscious on the bed due to said love's fear.

With a heavy heart, he decided that he had spent a long enough time waiting for her to come around and if she did not love him, then she would make him. He stepped forward to rest his hand on her unmarked shoulder.

"Teresa…" He began, and she removed her hands from her face to glance up at him—green eyes meeting steel blue, her expression explaining to him that she was beyond confused and lost. "It'll be all over soon, baby." She looked as if she wanted to raise her eyebrow slightly in question, but at the last moment—she forewent that to mutter his name.

Avery had ultimately decided then, as he started speaking softly; he watched her slip into the empowerment of his suggestion, as her eyes fluttered shut, and he slowly took his hand off her shoulder only to have her open her eyes and press her soft lips to his.

"Alyson," Avery called, as the brown-haired woman slipped back into the room and Teresa had finished kissing him. "Finish getting her ready for our wedding." Teresa sighed contently, while she rested against his hold. "Teresa?" The woman glanced up at him. "Go with Alyson." She nodded and stepped over to Alyson.

"Yes." Both women replied, and Teresa sat down on the vanity while Alyson bent down to grab the curling iron from the floor to continue on the dark haired woman's hair as Avery turned to the unconscious man on the bed, and grabbed him to hoister him over his shoulder.

Avery was not quite finished with the man just yet, as Avery holstered Jane through his large mansion and back down to the basement. He dropped the unconscious ass on the concrete ground, head hitting the concrete with an echoing thud, as Avery pressed his full hand to Jane's mouth and then pressed his empty hands to Jane's shoulder to leave one last gift to the man who had ruined all his perfect plans.

**OoO**

Lisbon felt the Darkness around her, blanketing her to keep her safe from whatever poison was trying to invade her memory, as she knew something was of importance here because the first time she had visited this twisted wonderland of the dark, had been when Jane had hypnotized her almost ten months ago.  
Then, she was addled up on enough drugs to cause her nearly perfect memory to falter, enough to cause her to fail a polygraph and almost be in prison for a crime she knew she had never committed. The hallucinations, which she had failed to mention to Jane, had taken her mind from her the night of the murder, as well as her sanity as she had imagined his lips and body pressed against hers. However, all it happened to be was a damned hallucination built off the combination of dreams and a high enough dosage of lorazepam.

It seemed like a ridiculous idea, and it seemed a bit crazy (even as she analyzed it over in her mind) that maybe, just maybe someone had hypnotized her.  
The fleeting memory of Duane's hand on her shoulder, his soft words in her ear and the impending Darkness flooded her; he had hypnotized her, which explained…

Oh God. _No_.

No.

_No suggestion in the world can make you do something against your moral character, against your true will_, Jane had once told her about hypnotism.

If that was so, then why could he….how could he…? Had having been kidnapped by Red John unhinged him to the point where he was completely fine with killing women and sexually assaulting others?  
Lisbon allowed her eyes to close, and she wondered, just how was she going to get out of this one? If she was going to get out, that was.


	24. Goodnight, Goodnight

**Red Silences**

Thanks to **Anna**, **Frozen Bacon **and **lisbon69 **for the reviews!

I recieved a question about the reason why I chose to name last chapter Rhiannon. I chose the title because Fleetwood Mac's song "Rhiannon" inspired me to write the chapter, just as this chapter was inspired by the song "Goodnight, Goodnight" by Maroon 5.

I should probably warn there's another cliffhanger, but I know you all knew that anyway.

* * *

**Chapter Twenty-Four**

**Goodnight, Goodnight**

The priest, Avery had managed to find through hours of black market searching, and he was probably the only priest who would legally wed a captor and his captive for a "reasonable price" which went anywhere from 2.5 million dollars to about one-grand. It didn't matter to him how much he had to pay because he knew he wanted his queen to bare his name, the children they were sure to have and his wealthy title.  
He had even managed, as he had been searching for the perfect mansion with his stolen wealth to find a beautiful Victorian mansion, which held a large enough yard for their children to run around on. To him however, the most important find, had been the enormous and beautifully adorned ballroom, decorated in gold trim and dark marble floors attached to the home.

Avery had never been one for religion, which meant he had wanted to keep the church out of their marriage as much as possible, and that left him with the decision to find somewhere large enough to entertain guests. At the same time, however, he wanted an almost traditional wedding between himself and Teresa in a token of love and affection (even if the love was forced, and the affection was by command), especially as he stood at the alter waiting for his gorgeous bride-to-be.

The witnesses to this holy act of matrimony included his own self, Teresa, the priest, Stephen Montgomery, Rhys, who acted upon the role of best man and stood directly beyond him and Alyson, who played the double act of flower girl and bridesmaid.  
Patrick Jane however, would become the single most important witness as he would not only walk the blushing bride down the aisle, he would also give her away to the man, who planned to marry her.

It was the perfect plan, Avery decided, as the pre-recorded wedding march filled the air, he clasped his hands together, smiled brightly and turned to face the main oak doors to await his beautiful bride; nothing could or would stop him now, that was for sure.

The doors opened slightly to allow Alyson entry into the room; the gown decided for her was a white knee length silk number with black straps and a plunging neckline, which managed to reveal a hefty amount of soft, pale skin and cleavage. As she stepped down the red carpet, white flowers flowing from her pale fingertips to canvas, the black marble floor on both sides of the carpet but slowly the focus shifted off the beautiful Alyson, to the white-veiled bride who trailed, slowly behind her.  
Avery gasped; Teresa's dark (usually straight) hair had been styled in light curls to frame her soft features, and the dress he had specifically imported overseas for her, the emerald green silk number with no straps flowed elegantly to the floor, trailing behind her left his imagination running ramped. The mouth-watering dress exposed the curves that he, after watching her for twenty months, never even realized she had because she was in those unimaginative outfits, which left much more to desire.

He tore his eyes away from his beautiful bride to glance disdainfully at the figure next to Teresa; the shell of a man who guided her down the aisle and then, to the alter, his face horribly blistered and red. He wore an expensive grey tuxedo, a blue tie to match Avery's attire and after a few more antagonizing moments of watching Jane limp down the aisle with the lovely bride and the organ music repeating in the background, Jane approached the alter with Teresa. He grabbed her hand to place it in Avery's grasp, to which Avery grasped firmly and stepped toward the priest, his hands lifting the veil covering her face to reveal his smiling bride as they turned to face each other.

Jane backed away slowly, to sit in one of the only chairs in the room as the priest opened his book and began the ceremony.

He said his vows first, and admitted to the witnesses and the bride before him that he had loved her from the first day they had met. He had been coming from one of the many corner coffee shops near the CBI and had bumped into her accidently, papers tumbling from his arms, she had leaned over to pick them up for him, their eyes meeting, and it was love at first sight. The story left his bride sniffling in joy, a soft smile across her face and she followed his example to say her vows, and then admitted to the witnesses and the groom before her that she could not love a man more, even if she tried with all of her heart.

"If anyone has a reason for why these two should not wed, please speak now or…" and the ballroom door burst open, revealing Van Pelt, Cho and Rigsby.

"Oh, more guests." Avery muttered, as Teresa leaned over and giggled in his ear to which he softly responded with a kiss to the cheek

**OoO**

Out of everything, the agents were expecting to find, they were not expecting to find an impromptu wedding ceremony between their boss and some man they had never seen, or even met before.

Van Pelt, who surveyed the partygoers with her brown eyes stood between Cho and Rigsby, all three of them pointing their weapons toward the party, and from where she stood, she could at least name three of the six wedding party.

Rhys, Alyson and obviously, Lisbon remained in the emerald green dress.

"So nice of you to join us, agents." The man, who held Lisbon's hands greeted. "We were just getting ready to get married…"

"Sir." Rigsby called, his blue eyes focused on the blonde-haired person. "Back away from her, slowly." The man refused, as he moved to wrap his arms around Lisbon. "If you do not back away, I will fire." The man merely grinned, shrugged and then laughed.

"Go right ahead." Rigsby aimed his gun and took fire, the sound of the gunshot echoing around them as Rigsby watched the bullet speed toward the man when instead, the bullet turned slightly and hit Lisbon, the man caught her as she fell toward the floor with her abdomen seeping scarlet, staining her emerald green dress.

Rigsby cursed, as the man grew angry still clutching Lisbon to him as he crouched down on his knees and settled her on the ground, before he pressed his fingers to her wound to apply pressure to it.

"You shouldn't have done that." The man hissed. "You shot my wife…"

"Sir, she isn't your wife." Rigsby tried to reason. "Step away from her, we'll get her the best medical attention…"

"No!" The man cried, holding onto Lisbon for dear life. "If you come any closer, I'll kill us both!" The man moved his hand into his tuxedo pocket only to pull out a small, silver vial.

"Sir," Cho tried. "Put it down, we need to take her to the hospital before she dies…"

"No!" The man repeated again, and he carefully opened the vial to lift it to his lips and sip at it before he glanced down at Lisbon, his scarlet stained hand moved from her abdomen to her face where he left her blood upon her face in wake as he guided her lips open and poured the vial into her mouth. "I'm not leaving without my wife."

Cho glanced at the other two from the corner of his eye and stiffly nodded, three gunshots echoed in the room simultaneously, after that.


	25. Speed of Sound

**Red Silence**

Thanks to **Frogster**, **lucy**, **Frozen Bacon **and **Jisbon4ever **for the reviews!

I foresee only three more chapters after this one, and these last four are loosely considered as the epilogues to each character (or groups of character). Enjoy!

* * *

**Chapter Twenty-Five**

**Speed of Sound**

Cho sighed, as he finished his last form for the day and possibly his last form within the CBI, if Agent Hightower had her way. Van Pelt glanced at her own last sheet of paperwork as her hand glided along, a pen in hand to provide a documented account of the events that had occurred nearly a fortnight ago and Rigsby just stared down at his already empty desk with his arms crossed against his chest.  
None of them blamed the bureau for the investigation pending on their whole unit, considering that Rigsby had withheld information from Hightower, and the three of them had opened fired without probable cause. The investigation on the ex-senior agent and consultant, however ran deeper than anyone would care to think about due to the unaccountable actions of Lisbon, who had not only lied to her supervisor but had also possibly aided Jane in the killing of the three females. Jane was also pending a mental evaluation to see if he were sane enough to stand trial for the three murders, as well as the extensive medical treatment for the countless welts, bruises and burns plastered across his body.

At the end of the day however, Hightower could ultimately decide the fate of himself and Van Pelt due to the shots that they had fired off were in defense of Lisbon and themselves. Rigsby unfortunately was under the most scrutiny from the state of California due to his shooting Lisbon, and causing their suspect to try to take his own and Lisbon's life with poison—he was on suspension without pay for at least three months, pending the hearing in a week or so, which would decide his ultimate fate.  
Hightower had told the three of them that if it were up to her alone, she would not take them back due to their continuous vagrant disobeying and mockery of the justice system. Cho had wanted to ask her, as she chewed the three out, if the justice system ignored the countless amounts of good deeds and the blatant loyalty toward doing what was right instead of what was easy, then why were they even protecting others?

Sure, they could have easily decided to throw both Jane and Lisbon to the sharks, but to them, it was more than the price of what loyalty could bring them. This unit, for some, was the closest thing to family that they would probably ever know, and family was supposed to protect their own; if anything, he did not regret his decision to rush in, and he definitely did not regret losing his job, if he did that was.

"Look at it this way," Rigsby had joked about his suspension. "We can finally date." Van Pelt had rolled her eyes and muttered something about his blatant optimism but still, she was smiling which was more than any of them had done lately. He knew, though Rigsby had never said anything about it that the man was slowly drowning in a sea of guilt and nightmares due to him shooting Lisbon. Luckily, for them, Rigsby had not turned to drinking his problems away. Van Pelt had also taken to spending most of her time around the man, which had left herself and Rigsby somewhat less sexually frustrated and much happier, even if they were exhausted at work the next morning.  
Footsteps echoed throughout the nearly empty bullpen, and Cho glanced up to find Hightower, her arms crossed against her chest, as her eyes pierced each of them with a calculating and cool stare.

"You all were my best team," Hightower remarked, coolly. "No matter how unconventional your methods may have been, they closed cases and at the end of the day—that was good enough for me." She paused for a few moments. "However, I cannot ignore nor allow what happened just two weeks ago." The three remained quiet. "If I ignore it, it may happen again and next time….someone may end up dead."

"Agen…" Rigsby interrupted, and she turned on him.

"Rigsby, allow me to finish." Hightower interrupted, and he lapsed back into silence. "I said this once after I had realized what had happened, if it were completely up to me I'd fire you all from the CBI…but…loyalty is one of those core assets we yearn for here." Cho, Van Pelt and Rigsby glanced up at her in mute surprise. "Cho, Van Pelt—off the record, I admire your loyalty to both Jane and Lisbon but on the record, I want to know how you both could be so reckless." Van Pelt glanced at her own desk, light pink tinting her cheeks. "Rigsby, you know how I feel about what you did." Rigsby nodded. "I need your badge, and gun." Rigsby slid the top drawer of his now about to be empty desk to hand the woman his badge, and his gun. "Thank you." Rigsby stood to leave from his desk when Hightower's voice interrupted him. "I didn't say you could leave." He slid back into the seat to stare at her. "In lieu of the events, I put the both of you on probation," she glanced at Van Pelt and Cho. "For six months in which time, you both will be reevaluated to be reinstated as off probation."

It was better than either of them could expect, and yet Cho did not think it was fair that Rigsby had received what he had, when he had only been protecting Lisbon.


	26. Lose Control

**Red Silences**

Thanks to **Jisbon4ever**, **lucy**, **Frogster**, **Anna **and **allanon9 **for the reviews.

Alas, another update—another day of questions that go unanswered about Jane or Lisbon. I ensure you that you'll find out soon enough about the fate of our main characters. Now, I can technically answer all questions related to Avery.

* * *

**Chapter Twenty-Six:**

**Lose Control**

"Where is she?" Avery seethed, his steel blue eyes glancing up at the bitch in the white lab coat. "Where is my wife?" The woman made no moment, her baby blue eyes peering at him from over her clipboard as she continued to scribble something down from across the room.

He tore his eyes away from the woman to focus on the eerie white walls, and the handcuffs around his own wrists, which if he pulled hard enough, cut into his wrists causing blood to trickle down his pale skin and splatter onto the white shirt and pants that covered his body. "Is she dead?" For the first time, the woman acknowledged him and he realized that she was pretty, especially with her shoulder length blonde hair and blue eyes but she held nothing on his Teresa.

In fact, he was pissed for the doctors having saved his life—he was supposed to have died with his wife, to where the both of them could be happily together, forever without the interruptions of the damn California Bureau of Investigation, without the interruptions of Patrick Jane or even the interruption of damned doctors who thought they knew everything.

"You don't have a wife."

He brought his eyes from his red-splotched pants to stare at the woman who dared to tell him otherwise, and spat in her direction, which gained him no response besides a blink.

"I do have a wife," he coldly threw, as he held his hand out for the doctor to see the engagement ring on his finger. "We were getting married when the damn CBI interrupted our ceremony." The woman didn't look surprised, and continued to scribble on her clipboard. "I marked her as mine." Avery had burnt his initials into her shoulder, as a reminder that she was his.

"You poisoned your wife, and caused her to be fired at."

"I didn't do any of those things that damn agent shot at her!" he defended, with a slight pause before he continued. "I didn't want her being taken away from me, she's _mine_."

"You poisoned her though."

"I poisoned myself and her, there's a difference between being selfish and wanting what's best for you both."

"You gave yourself a tiny amount of poison, and had her drink the rest." Avery glanced up at the woman in the white coat and shrugged.

"I thought I was going to die, I know my heart stopped in the ambulance about three times." He muttered, he did not remember much from after having taken the poison except that three people fell to the ground, from the impact of the bullet. "I failed at dying." He shrugged. The woman stared at him, and he turned away from her, his steel blue eyes resting on his pants again.

"We're going to help you here, Avery." The woman responded.

"Where is my wife?" The woman did not respond to his question, and she turned on her heels to leave the white colored room silently as Avery screamed the same question repeatedly to an empty audience.

He knew however, beyond that silver door that kept him locked away from the rest of the world—they were peeking in on him, watching him and laughing at him; but they were the fools. Most of those idiots would never have a wife to love them and to cherish them even if…he shook his head, under his control or not…she had loved him, and in his mind, she would always love him, which was why they were better off dead than alive.  
Teresa was the only person, who would or could ever understand his fascination with her, and he was the only person who would or could ever understand her; they belonged together.

Maybe, in time the damn doctors would see that and end his life and hers (if she wasn't already dead, that was.)

The screams eventually tapered off into dark, malicious laughter while he threw his head back and laughed, yanking the chain between his wrists as hard as he could, and the metal continued to cut into his wrists, red dripping down and staining him even further.

"We'll be together my wife, someday."

**OoO  
**

"Hello Avery," The blonde haired doctor greeted, stepping into his room as he sat on the bed with his legs crossed.

"Hello." He greeted.

"How are you doing today?" He shrugged.

"How is my wife?" She shrugged, and the game continued on as it had for the past week—she would always ask him how he was doing, and then he would in return ask about the health of his wife. "I think you should tell me, I have right to know."

"Avery, she isn't your wife."

"Yes," he insisted, with his eyes meeting hers. "She is."

The doctor stepped closer to him, and sat down on the bed besides him to which he hid the smile blooming across his lips.

"You need to understand," the doctor told him. "Teresa Lisbon is not your wife, and will never be your wife."

"She loves me."

"She doesn't…"

"She loves me." He repeated, irritated. "And I love her, we belong together." She glanced at him before taking a deep breath.

"That's going to be impossible," the doctor muttered softly, and Avery's eyes widened in surprise and happiness—they were going to be together soon, he just needed to find a way to get to her in Heaven.

"I'll be with her, just to let you know." Avery explained, flashing a brilliant smile while he began to laugh, which caused the doctor to leap off the bed and bid the man good day as he continued to laugh himself into finally being medicated, by one of the other nurses.

_I will be with you soon, my love._

Even in his medicated dreams, he could already imagine ghosting his hand out to touch hers, the identical wedding bands gleaming on their fingers as they looped hands together and kissing her soft lips with his own as they still had those small children, running around on that yard with the ballroom floor to dance the decades away.


	27. These Hard Times

**Red Silences**

Thanks to **Frozen Bacon**, **Jisbon4ever**, **Country2776**, **lucy **and **Frogster **for the reviews!

I'll have the final chapter posted tomorrow. I can't say anything other than I loved how this chapter and the last chapter turned out. I thought about posting it along with this one, but because I wanted to leave another cliffhanger—I figured I'd wait. I doubt one more day is going to seriously cause a problem, but you never know…it might.

* * *

**Chapter Twenty-Seven:**

**These Hard Times**

"…I don't remember much." Alyson gave; her once silky-like brunette hair hung like a greasy curtain in her face while her shadowed blue eyes stared at the silver table where her trembling hands remained. "He knocked on the door; I saw him using the security feed from my computer and I rushed to him, I threw open the door and threw my arms around him, he pushed me away and forced himself on me." She glanced up at the agent, only to flinch at the cold and disbelieving stare she was receiving.  
Though they had been at it for at least three hours after her discharge from the hospital, she still remained to her story that she didn't remember anything after Rhys had used a stainless steel kitchen knife to slice through her right wrist to collect her blood into an urn.

Hospital psychiatrist, Dr. Emily Shultzer had been assigned to Alyson due to the possible amnesia complications after being stuck in a three-day coma. Alyson had to admit though, it had frightened her to wake up in an unknown room, not know how she got there, why she was there or feel the fear rush through her bones every time one of the male nurses came into the room.  
She had been sedated twice due to her screaming, and had been taken to the hospital's psychiatric ward where they would watch her, until her discharge in fear that she might take her own life because of when a panic attack struck, she would take to attacking her own self with her sharp nails.

Dr. Shultzer had told her that whatever she (Alyson) had witnessed had been too great a trauma for her mind to comprehend, and overtime her memory would eventually come back to her.

"His h-hands held me to the bed, and he…he…" Alyson broke, tears streaming down her bruised face, the emotional turmoil she had been feeling for the past two weeks flooded her system; every single emotion from complete terror to the self-hatred and disgust flew through her, suddenly, she turned quickly and lost her light lunch all over the interrogation room's floor.

"Come on," the female agent offered with just a bit more compassion than before. "I'll drive you home." Alyson nodded, her head pounding and eyes blurring with tears.

**OoO**

She let herself in the dark apartment, quietly shutting and locking the door behind her before she fell down to the ground, her back pressed against the hardwood door with her head in her hands, as tears streamed down her usually pale face.

_Why can't I remember anything? _

Alyson silently sobbed, her shoulders moving up and down while no sound bled from her mouth. As a small child in a rather dysfunction home she had learned the importance of being seen but never heard; her quiet sobs however, weren't for the benefit of herself but rather for the benefit of Rhys, who she knew would be sleeping at this hour.  
He had been discharged from the hospital six days before her, and had yet to see visit her; she didn't want or need to be a burden to the man who…

Her head pounded again, her mouth dry and world spinning, which immediately reminded her of her first ever hangover she had possessed; the only difference between then and now however, had been the presence of her best friend, who had sat with her while she had rambled on about unicorns incoherently.  
One of the nurses had to tell her about Rhys' release, about his perfect health besides a few broken bones, and about the investigation between herself, Rhys, Teresa and Patrick for something she couldn't even remember having happened.

The sound of a door opening, caused her to let out a muffled scream, heart pounding in her chest, against her ribs as she dropped her hands from her head to clutch at her knees, holding them to her chest while she squeezed her eyes shut. She then heard footsteps, and she kept wishing she would disappear into nothing as her nails scrapped across her pale-scarred arms, the footsteps suddenly stopped and Alyson screamed, her body thrashing around on the hard wooden floor.

Reality was all a twisted blur to her now.

**OoO**

Rhys had been avoiding Alyson, due to her extremely clingy, hugging and dependent personality which he didn't want nor need around at the moment, the time alone for the past six days had given him enough time to decide what he needed to do—after jogging several times to the nearby lake to feed the ducks, and after being questioned by the local police and the CBI, he had decided to go to the apartment and start packing his stuff up.  
As much as he did love and care for Alyson, he needed to move out of the apartment and as soon as she was discharged from the hospital, he planned to tell her.

Alyson would be fine by herself, and a little time apart would do them good—he had heard the main door close while he had placed one of his poetry books into a bag, and he ignored it for a few minutes to prepare how he was going to tell her.

"Alyson, you know you're important to me…but I think I need to move out." He allotted himself a deep breath and exited his room to find Alyson clutching her knees to her chest, her fingernails scrapping across her arms, the dim lights of the streetlights casting a shadow on her figure through the windows. He stepped closer and then stopped, as the brown-haired woman began to scream and thrash her body around on the floor.

Rhys hesitated; his eyes falling on the screaming form of his best friend until she finally hit her head against the door and fell silent—he left her there, silently heading back into his own room trying to ignore the pestering thought that Alyson may not be all right after all.

He needed to leave, and so he did, loading his books and everything else with him into his vehicle without telling Alyson his reasons for doing so.

It wasn't until a few days later that the hospital would call, the blood work that Alyson had provided to the hospital for testing had come back to be discussed; Alyson had been sitting on the small balcony, her mind whirling as her legs were pulled to her chest against the brick wall.

_How could he have just left me without saying anything?_

It made her feel every once of the worthless person, she had thought herself to be.

Did he not want her around? Did he blame her from all their problems? Could he not stand her anymore?

The heated tears poured down her cheeks, splashing against her own lime green robe as the phone next to her rang and she glanced down at it, hoping it to be Rhys but instead it was the hospital.

"Hello?" She sniffled, and the nurse on the other end proceeded to tell her something that for anyone else would have been good news.

"Alyson, I'm calling about your blood test." The nurse explained. "The tests were all normal except one thing, you're pregnant." Alyson grew deathly silent, and the nurse continued. "Aren't you excited?"

"Yes." She quietly replied. "Thank you." Alyson hit "end" on the call and continued to sob, this time not caring if the Devil himself heard her sobs.

She didn't even need to know whose it was, because she knew this was why Rhys had left her. He didn't want to take care of a child, and he definitely didn't want her, with careful precaution, she decided not to tell him and suffer, all on her own like she deserved.


	28. Gravity

**Red Silences**

Thanks to **Frogster**, **lucy** and **Jisbon4ever **for the reviews, I also want to thank everyone through the course of this story for the reviews, the reads and the alerts. I give you all hugs, and hopefully, an amazing end to such an angsty story.

In the very first chapter of this, I said something about writing a sequel...and I think because of how the last three chapters ended and especially how this one ended, I feel I should go ahead and write a sequel.

Anyway, I hope you enjoy the last chapter!

* * *

**Chapter Twenty-Eight: **

**Gravity**

"How are you feeling today, Teresa?" Lisbon shrugged, the long sleeved shirt, which covered the welts on her arms where Avery had beaten her, raised up an inch on her stomach and she hurriedly pulled it down, as she held her green gaze on Emily's blue. "This," Emily imitated Lisbon's shrug, as she leaned back in her own desk chair. "Is not an answer."

"I'm okay, I guess." Lisbon offered, quietly—the poison had been completely repelled from her body and the gunshot wound across her abdomen had almost healed nicely.

"That's good." Emily praised with a small smile. "What did you do today?" Lisbon shrugged again; and at Emily's look, she tensed, for a few moments, she thought she was back at Avery's; she shivered and clenched her arms tighter to herself, which had not gone ignored by the woman doctor. "Teresa? What's wrong?"

"Nothing," she lied, when in fact everything before her very eyes were falling apart; she couldn't even do anything without the flashbacks of her time at Avery's haunting her or the guilt still plaguing her at the memory of Jane's haunting screams from the burning of the curling iron, which always remained just below the surface of her restless thoughts.

She shifted in her seat, not only was her personal life in complete ruins, but the very people who had made her who she was, today, were tearing her professional life apart. Hightower had decided to strip her of all titles besides the Miss before her name due to her actions involving the three murdered women and her connection with Jane, the suspicion however; she could deal with... the worst part of everything she had to deal with. She also had to deal with the fact that everyone was ridiculing her statement on the events, laughing behind her back as she told them about the hypnotism.

"Teresa?" Emily softly called, and Lisbon glanced up from the sleeve of her shirt to glance at the woman, as she leaned forward—her brunette hair skimming her shoulders against the green suit jacket she wore.

"I was thinking…" Lisbon managed and Emily nodded.

"About?" Emily asked, after a few moments of silence.

"Death."

"Ah." Emily responded, gravely. "You aren't thinking about committing suicide are you?"

"No," Lisbon answered, truthfully. "I was just thinking about what Sam thinks of me now…" She didn't finish her sentence, but it spoke volumes between the both of them—Emily knew she thought of herself as a whore because two men had happened to sexually assault her, in a period of one day and yet, she had not almost castrated that asshole, like she had done to Jane.

"Teresa," Emily sighed. "It isn't your fault." Lisbon blinked, was she talking about Bosco's death or the sexual assaults, because both of them seemed like her fault. If she hadn't of gone and gotten herself too wrapped up in the Red John case, Bosco might have actually still been alive while if she had chosen to tell Hightower the complete truth about where she was going, she may have avoided the situation completely.

No matter what Emily said, Lisbon knew it was her fault for the destruction of her personal and professional lives but if it made her feel any better, Jane's personal and somewhat professional life was falling with hers pending a mental evaluation.

"I'm the only one of us, who can remember anything." Lisbon quietly stated. "And they won't believe me."

"Have you spoken to Alyson?" Emily questioned, and Lisbon shook her head. "Rhys?" Lisbon nodded.

"Last week."

"Did he have anything new to shed?"

"No." All he had said was that he wanted to end their relationship, but he still wanted to remain good friends.

"What about your unit?"

"They came in yesterday to tell me the good news." Emily nodded. "Cho and Van Pelt weren't suspended and Rigsby's pending trial is sometime this week."

"Would you want to go?" Lisbon blinked before she shook her head.

"Not really," Lisbon had not exactly wanted to leave her hospital room for the past few days, the tension of seeing other people besides the nurses or people she knew frightened her. "Rigsby can handle himself; I have full faith in him."

"What about Patrick then?" Lisbon glanced down at the floor before she took a deep breath.

"This morning." Emily eyed her, and Lisbon refused to continue—what had happened between her and Jane that morning was something private between the both of them and the doctor did not need to know about it.

Personally, Lisbon was still unsure about the whole conversation because Jane (who was not even supposed to be out of his hospital bed escaped from his room in a wheelchair) but reflecting over it, she realized it was not the worst thing it the world to happen to the both of them.

"He said he was sorry." Lisbon released and Emily raised her eyebrow in response.

"About?"

"Stuff." The "stuff" hadn't been specified, nor did she ask it to be.

Lisbon didn't have much of a chance to reflect on that however, as one of the nurses popped into the room to find the man but after he and the nurse had left, Lisbon wondered what all he had to be sorry about, she doubted he remembered that anyhow. It was not as if he remembered anything, and he obviously didn't remember his actions to her and she definitely did not want to tell him, it was painful enough being around him without wanting to scream or runaway.

For now, she was able to admit to herself what had happened and whether anyone else believed her or not was going to be slim to none.

Hypnotism, as Emily had said, was a risky subject to use as a weapon in any murder and had likened it back to the fact that hypnosis was thought to be apart of the imagination, she had almost laughed…Alyson's comment about hypnotism nearly three weeks ago had been dead on.

"I think this is where we'll stop for this week," Emily told her, and Lisbon hid her joy. "I'll see you the same day next week, at the same time." Lisbon nodded, hissing in pain at the tightness in her marked shoulder and Emily stood to walk the woman back to her room.

**OoO**

Jane stared down at his disfigured legs, the doctors had said that he'd be lucky if he'd ever walk again considering that the curling iron had done a number on his nerves; it would have seemed funny to him eons ago that one day he would be sitting in a wheelchair, possibly for the rest of his life due to the hypnotism.

Of course, he knew about it.

The bastard had given him two gifts in the last suggestion, one was to remember it and regret the choices he had made everyday and two was that he would never be able to speak about it, he wouldn't be able to tell the CBI, he wouldn't be able to tell Hightower, he wouldn't be able to tell Rhys and above all, he wouldn't be able to tell Lisbon he was sorry for what he had done.  
While yes, a suggestion could never make you go against your moral character or will—drugs had diminished his moral character and will and he would never be able to tell her that.

He would never be able to tell her that he loved her either, not after he could see fear in her eyes this morning, and it literally killed him. The relationship he and Lisbon had worked on building for the past two years had been completely ruined in a course of one night, everything he had strived for had been burned down and now, he awaited a mental evaluation to see if he were fit, enough to stand trial for the murders that someone else had made him do.

Avery had gotten off lucky, life in a psychiatric prison while the four of them; himself, Rhys, Alyson and Lisbon would be paying the ultimate price for years to come.

They had gone from having everything, to having nothing at all and that was his fault and his fault alone.


End file.
